The Queen, if Rhys leaves her side then she would certainly fall apart. If that happens, not even her presence by her side will help.
Her gaze fell on the ceiling of her tent. 'I can't sleep.' Pupilliam tossed and turned several times but eventually gave up as she stood up, and left her tent.
She walked around for a few minutes and reached the lake area, only to spot Lyn sitting on a huge rock in front of the lake and knitting. Seeing the red coloured scarf, Pupilliam sighs. She should have known from that exchange earlier, but it seems that Lyn hasn't given it to him yet.
Pupilliam watches her for a few minutes to see her concentrating. No, there seemed to be a lonely gaze in her eyes. How come? Isn't her relationship with Rhys very good right now? So, why does she still look like that? She debates for a few minutes before approaching the Queen from the back.
"I knew you brought it with you." Pupilliam commented.
Lyn almost dropped her knitting gear and the scarf into the lake but Pupilliam caught it on time and sighs.
"Even though you're the Queen now, you're still so clumsy." She places the scarf in Lyn's hands.
Lyn laughed awkwardly. "You scared me. I didn't think anybody would be awake this hour."
"I felt restless." Pupilliam admitted.
The talk she had with King Allen remained firm in her mind. What is she going to do once the war with the Snow Kingdom is over? The Queen will start her preparations for the Empress campaign. When Lyn finally becomes the Empress, what will she do?
'I can't stay.' Even though she hesitated to leave Lyn alone, she already understood after speaking
"Shouldn't you give that to him already? It looks finished." Pupilliam decided to shift the topic back to the scarf.
She knew if they continued on the previous topic, Lyn would see right through her. Thankfully Lyn didn't notice.
"I will, but I guess I am a bit afraid."
"Of him leaving you?" Pupilliam guessed.
Lyn nodded. "No matter how close we become. Sometimes I feel like there is a huge wall that I will never be able to overcome. The closer we get, the more I understand how the two of us have always lived in two different worlds."
"I think he will be very sad if he hears you say that."
At those words Lyn laughed weakly. "It seems you are starting to understand him better."
"Because I know he is the one who will make you happy, so I have reluctantly decided to accept him." Pupilliam grumbled and Lyn laughed more. "But, if he ever behaves the way he did before. I will assist King Kazuya in regaining your heart."
"I understand. However there is no need to worry. Rhys has changed for the better. The past and current him, I love them both equally. But, the current Rhys is the one I will choose to become my Emperor. He is the one who will stand by my side."
'Can I stand by your side too?'
Pupilliam swallowed those words. If she says it, Lyn will find out about her doubts and she doesn't want that to happen. Lyn has to have a clear mind and heart when she pulls the sword. Her troubles will only cause her problems.
"Then, why do you still think he will leave you? Is this about that guy?"
A troubled look flashed through her head and she nodded. "Rhys already found out and he asked me directly so I told him. Even though he told me it was okay, I knew he was upset."
"Do you think he will leave because of this?"
"I am worried about them meeting and Rhys feeling inferior. He doesn't make it obvious, but I could tell when I was still a Princess. He had complex feelings towards Kazuya. Recently he admitted to me that there was a time where he was jealous of Kazuya for being smarter, stronger and being able to understand me better. I just know if he meets Raven, he will start comparing himself." Lyn sighed. "If I knew this would happen, I wouldn't have acted on an impulse back then."
"You are not at fault, Queen Lyn. You were doing your best to appease the elders. I could tell it was getting increasingly difficult for you."
"I missed Rhys so much, and before I understood what was happening I was searching for any trace of him. That's why I started spending more time in the magician tower, and the magicians. Even though I knew I'd never find anybody like Rhys, Raven appeared. They are different but there talents are similar. For me that small fragment of similarity was enough."
"Even sir Raven couldn't replace him though." Pupilliam muttered.
"Indeed, Rhys is irreplaceable. I was a fool to think I would be content with finding somebody who is alike. Rhys will certainly notice what I did, I am worried that he will judge me. No, he isn't that type of person." Lyn trails off. "What I fear is him meeting Raven, understanding and blaming himself. Even though I equally share the blame for his loss of eyesight."
"It wasn't your fault. The reason you made them swap places was because you were worried about King Kazuya's condition. You wanted to keep him close just in case anything happened."
"But that was selfish of me. Not only did I make Rhys more insecure, he ended up with a severe injury. Because of my mistake, we were separated for so long even though he had already resolved himself to stay by my side."
Pupilliam frowned, as she thought. Lyn is taking the blame for everything that has happened. So, that explains the lonely look in her eyes.
"I truly do love Rhys and I want to be with him. But, I have already hurt him so much."
"Then you two are even. That man has hurt you just as much." Pupilliam exclaimed.
Lyn shakes her head. "No, it isn't the same. Rhys told me not too long ago that he heard the rumors about me, and that was why for a while he acted the same way he used to in the past. He wanted to test if I had truly become cold blooded."
"What was the conclusion?" Pupilliam hesitated to ask.
Their relationship seems fine on the surface but what if it was a lie? What if they are only putting on an act?
"That I'm still the girl he fell in love with, even if I have changed slightly, and he will continue falling in love with every new part of me."
Pupilliam blinked. Rhys actually said something that sweet to Lyn? No, he has always spouted such lines. But back then Pupilliam felt like he said them to just anybody. If it is the current him however, those words are for Lyn alone.
*Unedited*