If she uses Lyn's name, the girl would be very happy. Pupilliam could already see the bright smile on her face. But, that is precisely why she cannot do it. In the end Lyn is the Queen, no she is the future Empress. The fate of the Kingdoms, this entire Empire is in her hands. She cannot show a single sign of weakness. People already know how close they are, but if she maintains a distance. Then they won't try to take advantage and use her to weaken Lyn.
Pupilliam recalled the incident that happened not too long ago, when she thought about it she was terrified. 'To think they would capture my family-' Thankfully the incident was resolved when King Allen came over and helped. However she felt mortified, how could she have allowed that to happen?
As Lyn's head aide, her trusted knight. She should have been on her guard twenty four seven. To become a liability to her master is a great offence and it wounded her pride. That was why for a while she did not know how to behave around her.
'Pupilliam, as long as I have you by my side. I feel like everything will be okay.'
Words Lyn said to her a long time ago resurfaced in her mind. She wonders if that is still the case now. When Lyn said those words, it was shortly after she began to serve her as her aide. She found Lyn crouched in front of the fountain crying.
It was her first time seeing a member of royalty cry. While she understood that Lyn's circumstances were unusual, in the end the girl was still a noble. So when she said those words, it certainly surprised her.
From that moment onwards, she resolved herself even more to keep this person safe no matter what happens.
Who was it that said to her that Lyn has that effect on people? Pupilliam thought for a moment before a familiar figure surfaced in her mind. It was Rhys, Rhys was the one who said that to her. In the end the person that understands Lyn the most is that man.
In the past she thought the one with better understanding of Lyn aside from herself was King Allen. Her gaze fell towards the man walking behind her. Despite what he says about being here for a mission. Pupilliam knew that he must have travelled all this way to help Lyn.
"King Allen, do you still harbour feelings for the Queen?" Pupilliam asked.
"What brought this on?"
"Pardon me for saying so, but you feel like a hypocrite asking me to be less formal with the Queen. When you are the most formal one out of everyone."
Instead of a rebuttal, and lecture all she got was a silent King. It seemed her question surprised him rather than anger. After a while he spoke up.
"I do."
It was a faint whisper but she heard it loud and clear. Of course he does. Lyn doesn't know this, but she was the one who approved King Allen's visit earlier on the year.
'I could no longer stand by and watch the Queen moping around and being depressed. I couldn't stand by and watch her long for a man who may never appear in her life again.'
That was why she took drastic measures and approved King Allen's request. King Allen had been making repeated requests to visit the Kingdom. But the elders did not think it was proper. Since there were rumors floating around that King Allen took so long to get engaged because he still harbored feelings for Queen Lyn.
While the elders wanted Lyn to have another spouse, they did not want it to be somebody from another Kingdom. So naturally they did not approve the visiting rights. However, seeing Lyn cry each night. Seeing her occasionally spacing out during meetings and suffering alone. She had to do something.
"It was cruel of you to approve of my visit." Allen muttered. "While the Mist Kingdom elders were being harsh, they did what they had to for the sake of the Kingdom."
"Even more than the Kingdom, my loyalty lies towards the Queen and I knew the Queen missed you."
Not as much as she missed Rhys and Kazuya. But, Pupilliam knew after the war with the tyrant Queen, Lethia and the breaking of the engagement, the two never saw each other again.
Allen gave a low chuckle. "She missed me as a friend, and not romantically I am sure."
"Isn't it better than nothing?"
"Certainly." Allen nodded. "For a long time I didn't get married because of Lyn. While I accepted her decision to end the engagement, I knew in my heart that I wasn't over her. Because of that, I delayed my engagement with Cordelia."
"It is surprising that she waited that long for you. Didn't you get engaged a year after your engagement with Queen Lyn was over?"
"Yes, I managed to convince them that I wanted to focus on being the King and helping aide the damage due to the war with the tyrant Queen. For a while my family and the elders left me alone, understanding my choice. But, behind my back I knew they were already drawing a list of prospective candidates."
"Lady Cordelia is similar to Queen Lyn, is that why you accepted her?" Pupilliam wondered.
At those words Allen sighed. "It seems you are not shaking like a rabbit around me today."
It takes Pupilliam a moment to realize what he said and she coughs. "Since you have already seen through the situation with the Queen and me. I believe it is only right for me to ask questions."
"I see."
Actually, a part of her was still frightened. What is she doing dropping all formalities and bravely asking this person such questions? For the longest time she has always kept her head low around this person, because he is the symbol of all nobles. While her status may have risen, she is not a true noble and knew how most nobles looked at her with disdain. King Allen who was still a Prince when they first met was no exception to that.
At first she couldn't even speak in his presence, because he didn't permit it. Gradually over the years, she slowly became braver and lifted her head. She was in for a huge shock, the cold Prince who had been giving such instructions actually had a warm smile on his face when he looked at Lyn.
That was the first time she thought that even a person like this has feelings like any normal person. It wasn't just limited to her masters fiance, but she looked at her surroundings at the other nobles and realised there were more who behaved the same way.
*Unedited*