Lyn saw Teo raise his eyebrow and she sighed. So she can't deny that she is unusual, especially for somebody living during this time. However, this is only because her upbringing wasn't exactly normal. Had she been raised as a normal noble Lyn knew that she would have turned out exactly like all the others.
"Say Teo, what would you think if I had a child with Rhys?"
"Has it progressed that far already?" Teo seemed surprised.
"W-well, he mentioned it and I can't say I hate the idea either." Lyn muttered.
Actually she recalled her feelings very well when he mentioned it. A mixture of surprise, happiness and joy. She even started to picture what their future children would look like.
"An heir is needed for the throne. Right now, non of your remaining siblings want anything to do with the throne. So, your child is the only one that can succeed."
Brother Andrew and Shaaraya aside, she wonders what Kotaro is thinking. Despite what had transpired between them, she still thought of him as her brother, as a dear sibling. When they last saw each other, he didn't directly say he disliked her anymore. But that was not the face of somebody who had fond feelings for her either.
"Your response is too formal." Lyn sighed. "I understand an heir is important. But, having children just for the sake of them taking the throne doesn't seem right to me."
"You misunderstood, the reason why I responded that way is because that is what the elders want. My personal opinion as your friend however, is do you want a family?"
At those words her eyes widened. So, he still remembers that conversation they had shortly before she became the Queen.
"If your opinion has changed since the last time we spoke then I am relieved. However if you are only forcing yourself because you feel pressured then please consider. You said it yourself, you do not want the child to suffer like you did."
'That's true, back when I first married Kazuya. I wasn't ready to have children at all. The thought of having a child frightened me. Can somebody like me truly have children?'
Kazuya understood how she felt and that must be one of the reasons why he didn't touch her on their wedding night. That person is truly too kind for his own good.
"Kazuya." Lyn mumbled. "-has always wanted to have children with me. Even if he never spoke about it directly he always said stuff like wanting to leave something behind as proof of his love for me when he passes away. I used to get very upset whenever he said that."
"I recall those frequent tantrums, and how you wouldn't speak to him for days."
Lyn sighed. "I just don't like it. How could he accept his death so easily? If I didn't get angry when he said those words he would think it is okay to say that."
"I see, that is natural. But whenever you got mad he would blame himself. 'I know I shouldn't say stuff like that but I just want to prepare her. If it is possible to have a future with her, I would stop being considerate of Rhys and just take her away. But I can't do that.'"
Lyn sighed again when she heard the last part.
"He wanted children, but he also understood that I was battling with my emotions. Even after the war three years ago he still limited how many times he slept with me. He did this so he could avoid the risk of me getting pregnant. The elders must have pressured him and yet he never mentioned a word to me."
Kazuya is an idiot, but the real fool is her. Even after she confronted master regarding her missing memories. She pushed aside her 'emotions' towards Rhys and 'focused on Kazuya.' It must have been more painful for Kazuya that way. The past five years he must have spent it thinking that he stole her from Rhys.
"A foolish King and Queen. However, you brought much joy and peace to this land." Teo trailed off. "A children from you two would certainly make people happy. But, they wouldn't dismiss your child with sir Rhys either."
"The announcement regarding mine and Rhys relationship won't be simple. No matter how many dissatisfied voices there are towards Kazuya as King, there are still those who respect and have gotten used to him. Five entire years have passed after all. Kazuya was the one who helped me settle the damage my sister left behind, the people are thankful."
"However, sir Rhys was the one who helped you win the war five years ago. Due to you losing your memories, there was a strict order issued by the elder council not to mention sir Rhys in front of you or what happened then. If anybody broke this rule they would be severely punished." Teo explained. "Of course us Knights helped with this."
A troubled look flashed through her eyes when she hears those words. While she understood that nobody wanted to trigger her, what type of punishment did those people who accidentally revealed it make?
It was almost like Teo understood what she was thinking.
"Do not worry, it was a simple case of erasing memories. There were no underhanded dealings. Although there were a few who suggested relocating and bribing the people with money. Pupilliam would not stand for it."
Lyn chuckled. She could already imagine Pupilliam lecturing them all.
"The announcement, I advise you to do it soon. There are already all sorts of rumors. However, considering how sir Rhys has changed. The rumors are not like how they were back when you first started dating."
"Right, nobody is saying stuff like this is a sexual relationship."
"I see, so you do have your memories back."
At those words she froze and clasped her mouth. But it was already far too late to take her words back.
"There is no use hiding it. I am one of your knights and I am responsible for watching over you. Naturally I will notice if something about you has changed. Ever since we returned to the Kingdom, your behaviour towards sir Rhys has changed drastically."
"Is-Is it that different?" Lyn stammered.
"Considerably so."
How embarrassing, how many other people have noticed? No, it doesn't matter to her who noticed. If possible she wants people to realise that she likes Rhys without her having to say anything.
*Unedited*