Rhys was the one who ran away, he was the one who left her.
'I should be bitter and hate him, but I cannot do that.'
The pain and agony she felt the past few years, and the loneliness. It is all because of Rhys. Those dark emotions finally make sense to her. It seems like she missed him. It's true that she ended up making memories with Kazuya and thus falling for him. But, the emotions she feel towards Rhys aren't something she can dismiss.
Right now she is granted a brief moment of peace before Jen marches her soldiers into Mist kingdom lands. When that happens, 'I do not know if I will survive. So, before then I must give Rhys and Kazuya answers.'
"Oh, I am not fooling around. Aren't I always dead serious?"
Yes he is and that's exactly why this current situation is a problem.
She doesn't hesitate to voice her thoughts on the matter. "T--that's precisely the problem."
Rhys is a noble guy and she understood his traits all too well. But she supposed it's because of that, that she knows how this will end up. Once he got like this, she knew there was no escape for him until he was fully satisfied. She has little choice but to let him have his way.
His hug on her suddenly tightened and she could feel his lips brush against the nape of her neck.
"Rhys?"
"Ever since I was young, I had always lived my life living the rules of nobility and the elite. I didn't think of anything else but that. From a very young age I've always understood what my position was in life. It didn't take me long to realise that the role I had been given as the fifth prince was to support my brothers. Which is what I did, I studied desperately and constantly every day in order to ensure that I would not be a hindrance to anyone. That's why I disliked those nobles who gained strength even without having to work for anything."
Even now his hate towards the nobility hasn't changed. In his travels he must have met many nobles. 'He even stayed in the Sun Kingdom long enough for the Princess there to fall in love with him.' But, there is no denying the hate in his voice when he speaks about nobles.
"Once they are all gathered together. They are manipulated and used. All their work and research, the progress they have made themselves. All of our progress --- it is lost, all for nothing. I understand why the measures are taken, that it is to prevent wars from happening. But that did not mean I accepted it. That man is the same. He creates weapons for his own personal goals and profit. To him, all of the power users are just another type of weapon. Lyn, to you the powers you have are to protect people. To save them. But there are those who do not think that way. There are those who would abuse your powers for money and influence."
Lyn didn't reply and bit her lip. She wanted to say something, anything. But it felt like the words were stuck in her throat, she cannot speak. What if she says something wrong? What if her words hurt him again?
The shame she felt towards her behaviour since they met again will not go away. Even if she didn't have memories, she should have at least treated him with respect.
But Rhys doesn't blame her his arms are gentle. They hold her close softly, tenderly like she is somebody precious.
She could hear the hitch in his voice.
Although she could not see his face or expression, but she knew inside he must be crying. He is tired.
Tired of all of this.
He has spent so long, so long hating the power users and delinquents. Building weapons to combat them , working against them. Instead of doing what he truly wants to do.
It isn't only him.
In the end she too is the same. The desire to protect people. To be able to do something. Even though she was supposed to remain ignorant, she wouldn't stand for it. That's why she gained it, the power to protect - the strength to be able to do something to help. Such convictions have blossomed to her leading everyone and to being one of the strongest in the empire. But perhaps, deep inside her deep down she is already tired of it all.
"I will say something that you won't understand. I was happy living with you." Rhys mumbled.
Her eyes widened hearing those words. She never thought that he would mention the past. He has kept their time together as a couple as a safely guarded secret.
"Leaving everything behind, running from battle. Living in complete peace. I liked that kind of life."
'It was the same for me.'
Though some of the days seemed repetitive and on some days, she would found herself not doing anything. For some reason she was okay with that. The old her certainly would have been more restless, no she would definitely have been appalled at his behaviour.
However she was, content with just being with Rhys. She assumed that she was the only one who had these thoughts. But it turns out Rhys was thinking the same too.
"I should have focussed on keeping you safe...and left the rest of the world well enough alone."
"With my personality, that wouldn't have been possible." Lyn finally spoke up, choosing her words carefully.
Rhys laughed weakly. "That's true, you were so stubborn and you always ran straight ahead into danger."
Is he complaining?
"But, that was one of your traits that I quite liked."
Lyn blinked hearing those words. "A-anyhow, I get it. You don't have to say anymore."
It feels like if they continue on this topic any longer, she won't be able to hide that she remembers everything.
Her thoughts break off when she feels Rhys place a gentle kiss on her forehead.
"Rhys?" Lyn whispered.
"Forgive me just this once." Rhys mumbled quietly.
"..."
Forgive him huh? Why does he need to apologise? He has every right to touch her since they never dissolved their marriage. However, she cannot comfort him with those words now. She cannot reveal to him that she has her memories back.
*Unedited*