Luke's P.O.V
Chloe texted me the notes later that night like she said she would, and I thanked her for it. I couldn't help but think about what happened earlier. I didn't think Chloe had seen Jess kiss me the night of the Halloween party, and I wondered why she didn't approach me afterwards. Maybe she felt too awkward and thought that I wouldn't want to hang out with her after Jess kissed me. My mind then thought about what Jess said about Chloe liking me but went with Kason instead thinking I liked Jess.
I sighed and turned over on my side as I laid in bed with my head resting on my arm. I still didn't understand it all. Part of me wanted to believe Jess but the other part thought it was impossible. Chloe was with Kason, and I couldn't do anything about it. If she truly liked me then why did she go with Kason?
Just stop thinking about it, Luke, I told myself. There really wasn't a point anymore. Even if it was true there was nothing I could do about it. Besides, it would just be flat-out cruel to Kason. I wasn't like Jess who would try to steal someone's partner. I wasn't a homewrecker.
I squeezed my eyes shut. I wanted to go to sleep but my body and mind wouldn't let me. After thirty minutes of trying to go to sleep, I gave up and walked inside the living room.
Jacob was sitting on the couch with his headset on while playing Call of Duty. He glanced in my direction and pulled his headset off.
"What are you doing up? It's past midnight," he said, his expression concerned. "You're usually not up around this time."
"I can't sleep," I said and shoved my hands in my pajama pants pockets. "Mind if I join you?"
He smiled. "Of course, you can," he said and tossed an Xbox controller at me.
I caught it with ease, grateful that I had fast reflexes.
"So, what's the reason you can't sleep?" he asked as we joined a game.
"You probably know why," I said as I played the game. My character successfully shot one of our enemies before dying to a grenade.
"Are you depressed about the whole Chloe and Kason thing?" he asked. It sounded more like a statement than a question.
"I wouldn't say depressed," I said. "It's more like disappointed more than anything."
"I just don't understand how you could get so worked up over a girl," Jacob said as he frantically pushed down on his controller and swiveled the joystick. "Chloe's not worth it–no girl is worth it."
"You only say that because you haven't found the right one," I muttered glumly as my character in the game died again.
Jacob shrugged. "Guess not."
"Speaking of girls not being worth it, I found out today that you slept with Jess," I cocked my eyebrow.
Jacob laughed a little. "Oh, so she told you that?"
"And she told me that she knew I liked Chloe," I said as I shot an enemy player.
"Well fuck. I swear I didn't tell her, man. I swear over my drunk dad's body that I didn't tell her. She was being nosy and took my phone–"
"Yeah she told me that, too."
I heard Jacob sigh of relief. "Look man, you know I would never do anything to hurt you. I hope you know that."
"I know," I smiled. "What are best friends for if they only stab you in the back?"
"Shit," he answered, and we laughed.
––––––––––
I was miserable all throughout the week and onto the next. Chloe wasn't acting as distant from me as usual, but it was apparent that she and Kason were getting closer. She acted more comfortable around him, making small jokes and even leaning towards each other during class. It sickened me to think that they might've kissed already. That didn't seem like something Chloe would do immediately, but what did I know. I barely knew about her dating history. I just remembered in tenth grade when I heard about her dating some guy named Vance from another school. It didn't last long so I wondered what went wrong. I hoped something would go wrong during her relationship with Kason. Wait…did I just think that? Did that make me a horrible person?
I wanted things to go back to the way they were going, but that was asking too much. Soon enough Kason would ask her to be his girlfriend, and I didn't know what I'd do then. Who knows, he might even ask her to marry him if the relationship went far enough. Why are you even thinking these things, Luke? They've only been dating for a couple of weeks. It would take them years before they would even consider marriage…right?
I shuddered to think that Chloe would ever get married–especially to Kason. For some odd reason I didn't like the idea of Chloe ever getting married. What I hated more was thinking about Chloe with anyone else but me. Oh great, now I sound like a crazy person who wants to marry her. I don't want to marry her. I just don't want her to be with anyone else that's all.
My phone vibrated in my pocket and I looked to see who texted me.
Kason: Hey man! I was wondering if you would want to hit up the gym with me? I was about to leave but I thought about you and thought that it would be fun to work out together.
I didn't really want to, but I had to workout today anyway. If I skipped more than a couple days I knew that I would be in bad shape for our football games.
Me: Sure! Meet you at the gym in five minutes?
Kason: I'm on my way!
I met Kason in the gym's parking lot and walked inside. We showed our school I.D.'s to the people working at the counter and went inside the weight room.
Kason and I chatted a little bit about football practice and how excited we were about this weekend of the big game. As we worked out and talked I knew he was bound to say something about Chloe. I understood why he liked talking about her, but what I didn't understand was why he thought I wanted to hear it.
"Chloe and I are going on a date the day before we let out for Thanksgiving," he said as he leg pressed.
"Oh really?" I asked as I slowly leg pressed while counting my reps. I didn't really want to hear what else Kason had to say except that I knew he would just say what he wanted anyway.
"Yeah…We would've this Friday except that she told me that you and her were working the concession stands for a play that night," he said as he gritted his teeth.
We continued to work out, all the while Kason was talking about Chloe and how great she was–which I already knew. After our workout we went to the locker rooms, showered, and got dressed in a different set of clothes.
"We should do a double date sometime," Kason said as he dried his hair. "It would be fun."
No, it wouldn't.
"You can bring that girl that you like or whatever."
No, I couldn't, I thought as I threw my towel in a hamper.
"I pieced it together by the way," Kason grinned from ear to ear. He looked as if he figured out the secret to the universe.
"What did you piece together?" I asked dumbfoundedly.
"Your first crush that you refuse to talk about. I know who it is," he smirked.
I knew he couldn't have been talking about Chloe. There was no way he would figure that out. If he did who knows what he'd do. "Really now? And why do you think that?" I smiled, wondering who he would possibly come up with.
"She's still in your friendship circle and you're not dating anyone else because of her. I finally got it! You like Hailee Macintyre," he shook his head in disbelief. "You've liked her the entire time and I didn't even know. Well, I thought for a minute when we did our study group that you might've like her, but now I know for sure."
To hear him say it was Hailee made me burst into a fit of laughter. I was laughing so hard I felt like I could piss my pants.
"What?" Kason asked, furrowing his dark eyebrows. "What the hell is so funny?"
I wiped my eyes. "So you think that…I–" I pointed at myself, "–like…Hailee Macintyre?"
"Well isn't it obvious?" Kason cocked his head.
I shook my head and continued laughing. "You couldn't be farther from the truth."
Kason then seemed irritated with himself. "Then who is it? I've been racking my brain, but I can't seem to figure it out."
"Don't worry about it. You'll never figure it out anyway," I finished chuckling.
"Well if it's not Hailee, who else is in our friendship circle that you could like? I know it isn't that girl you call Marshall, and it couldn't be that airheaded girl named Heather…" Kason's face went from irritated to shocked then to enflamed. "Don't tell me it's…" he paused, his nostrils flaring. "You don't like Chloe Claire, do you?"
"W-what?" I stuttered. My mind was racing, and my heart was pounding. There was absolutely no way that Kason could piece together that I liked Chloe. No way.
"Come on, Luke. You don't like the girl I'm dating, do you?" Kason asked, worry filling his voice. What was he so afraid of?
I took in a deep breath, looking him right in his eyes. Should I even admit that I like the girl he was dating? It wouldn't change anything. Chloe chose him. I was about to open my mouth to respond, but I didn't even get the chance.
"You fucking like her, don't you?" he squinted his eyes at me and shoved me angrily.
I threw my hands up in the air. I didn't want to fight him. "Look man–"
"Don't 'look man' me!" he shoved me again. "What the hell is wrong with you? This entire time I liked Chloe you liked her too? And you still like her even when she's dating me? What the hell is wrong with you?!"
"Kason it really doesn't matter. She likes you–"
"Damn right she likes me, now stay away from before you start meddling with her brain. I don't want you ruining everything between me and her. I've waited a damn long time to confess my feelings for her–"
"Do you not think that I've waited a damn long time too?" I interrupted. "I've liked Chloe way longer than you'll ever like her. You don't even know her! Do you know that her brothers are allergic to peanuts? Do you know that her mother is a nurse and her father is a firefighter? Do you know her favorite drink is Dr. Pepper and her favorite coffee is raspberry mocha?"
"Luke–"
"Do you know that she owns a fat cat named Miss Kitty? Do you know that she hates being alone the most in the world? Do you even know what she actually really wants to do in this world?"
"Luke–"
"So don't try to act like you know her and that you want what's best for her! I've known her for way longer than you ever will and will continue to like her more than you ever will!" I couldn't believe my confession. This could've easily been avoided if I said someone else–anyone else.
Kason's face was the deep color of scarlet. He was enraged. I could even see his veins popping out from his arms and neck. "You need to stay the hell away from my girlfriend, Armstrong."
"She's not your girlfriend and you don't own her," I gritted my teeth.
"I said to stay the hell away from my girlfriend, Armstrong!" Kason yelled and then swung at my face.
I ducked, letting Kason hit the wall instead. I knew he wanted to fight me, but I was better than this. I wouldn't fight him no matter how angry he made me. Besides, I knew if I fought him he'd end up in a hospital. "I'm not going to fight you, Kason," I said.
"You'd better stay the hell away from my girlfriend, Armstrong," he warned me once more.
"Kason I'm not going to stay away from her. She's my friend," I said as I backed away from him, trying to keep as much distance as possible between us. "And you can't make her stay away from me either."
"What the hell is going on here?" someone asked.
I turned to see that it was D'Marcus, defensive end of the Crimson Tide. He was in nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist as he stared at Kason and me with confusion in his coal, black eyes.
"Nothing," Kason said through gritted teeth.
"It better be or I'm about to whoop some ass," D'Marcus said while dusting his hands. He looked at me, cocked his head and said, "You okay, Armstrong?"
I nodded and grabbed my gym bag off the floor. I was getting the hell out of here before anything else happened. I walked out of the locker rooms and out of the gym, hearing what Kason said earlier ring in my ears. As I got into my truck I couldn't help but feel like my life was falling apart. Everyone seemed to know my secret in a matter of weeks that had taken me eight years to hide. Worst of it all I wondered if Kason would tell Chloe–or Jess for that matter even though she said she wouldn't, but obviously I couldn't trust her because she said the same thing to Jacob. All I knew in that moment was that I was screwed–big time.