KAZUKI
IT'S ALREADY been nine months since Ryuichi and I found out that I was pregnant. It was both shocking and fulfilling.
Hindi ko inasahang magkakaanak kami dahil aminado akong sa dami na nang nainom kong mga gamot noon upang kontrolin ang heat ko ay malaki ang posibilidad na magkakaroon iyon ng epekto sa aking katawan. And besides, I'm too old to be growing a baby inside me. But Ryuichi's reactions are rather different from what I expected.
When we became mates, sumagi sa isipan ko ang pagkakaroon ng anak pero hindi ko pinaalam sa kanya ang ideya kong iyon dahil inisip ko na baka magdalawang-isip si Ryuichi na ipagpatuloy ang aming relasyon dahil ganoon ako mag-isip. You see, most guys doesn't like the idea of having a child right away after they have just settled down.
Considering how our relationship started, I was pretty sure that Ryuichi wanted to spend quality time with me and overwrite those painful memories that we had. He was giving his best in trying to cope with our new situation. I felt that. But since day one up until now, he has been keeping a close eye on me, making sure I was getting enough rest, nutrition, and assistance to every day needs.
"Kazuki, the bath is ready. You wanna come in now?" tanong ni Ryuichi sa akin sabay tabi ng upo sa akin sa couch at hinapit ako ng halik sa labi.
"Sasabay ka na naman ba?" I asked while raising one eyebrow.
"Of course. The baby will be arriving soon and I don't want anything to happen to you while you are in there," tugon nito at pagkuwa'y maingat na hinawakan ang tiyan ko bago ito inamoy-amoy habang hinihimas. "Your belly is giving off a sweet scent, just like you do."
"You are really fond of noticing on how things smell," I said before giggling.
"No. It's just your smell and your belly's smell that I like the most," pagtatama n'ya na patuloy sa paghimas ng tiyan ko. Mayamaya pa ay naramdaman kong gumalaw ang baby ko sa loob. At dahil malaki na siya, it felt a little painful but Ryuichi's reactions were cute. He literally blushed and even brought his ear closer and slightly pressed it against my belly and his smile widened when he felt a little kick just now. "Ah. He kicked me!" he happily exclaimed.
"Maybe he can hear you."
"He does. I mean, he must. I want him to know that his mom and dad loves him so much," he said then kissed my belly. "So don't give your mom a hard time, 'kay? Be a good boy," kausap nito sa tiyan ko at napangiti na lang ako sa tuwa.
"Maligo na nga tayo," pag-iiba ko ng usapan at sabay naming tinungo ang banyo.
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Nasa kalagitnaan na kami ng pagsha-shower nang yakapin ako ni Ryuichi mula sa likuran. He wrapped his right hand on my chest and his other hand rested on my belly, carefully massaging it. From the way he pressed his body against mine, I could tell that he was aroused. Since he was strictly forbidden to have sex with me, he's pretty piled up and that's quite frustrating. I am a guy too so I know the uneasy feeling.
He burrowed his face on the left side of my neck and licked it before pecking it with a kiss. I slightly turned my face towards his direction and gave him a wanting look. For a moment, he hesitated because he might do something foolish but I smiled at him, telling him that it was okay.
Ryuichi then claimed my lips and I instantly knew how long he was wanting for this. We still shared passionate kisses but he's been trying to avoid too much skinship with me because that would trigger his desire to make love to me. He have been very considerate towards me and my well-being. And because of that, there are times that I would like to tease him but given my current situation, I can't possibly flirt with him.
「Now that I look like a big ball of cheese, baka ma-turn off pa si Ryuichi sa akin. And it's awkward to see a muscled guy like me with a big belly. Let alone that I'm already in my thirties,」dismayadong saad ko sa aking isipan.
I guess Ryuichi noticed my stupid insecurity and broke our kiss then looked at me with worry. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah," mahina kong tugon at pinilit ngumiti upang hindi na siya mag-alala.
"You seem down. Are you hurting anywhere?" tila naalarma naman siya nang kaunti at kinalas ang kanyang pagkakayakap sa akin at hinarap ako sa kanya.
Hindi ko naman naiwasang ngumiti nang mapakla. "I'm fine. Really."
Napabuntonghininga naman si Ryuichi sa katigasan ng ulo ko. He probably thought that I'm such a kid for feeling down for no reason. He loves me, I know that. It is just my little, useless ego that's making me pissed off. That's all.
"Kazuki, I really want to have sex with you. That's the fucking truth. It is hard to hold back. Just seeing you walking around makes me arouse," biglang amin n'ya.
"Alam ko, Ryuichi. Naiintindihan ko naman. Maging ako din naman ay gusto kang makatalik. It was just me who felt insecure all of a sudden. No need to worry," pagsisiguro ko.
"Insecure? Of what?" nagtataka n'yang tanong. Hindi ako sumagot. Basta na lamang akong yumuko at napahimas sa tiyan ko habang namumula ang mukha ko sa hiya. "I see…" tila dismayado nitong ani at pagkatapos ay narinig ko siyang nag-tsk bago hinawakan ang magkabila kong pisngi kaya napatingala ako sa kanya. "You are beautiful to me, Kazuki. You don't have to look perfect for me to like you or desire you because I will desire you forever. Tandaan mo iyan."
"Thank you, Ryuichi," napangiti ako sa labis na tuwa at sabik siyang niyakap pero pareho na lamang kaming natawa nang humarang ang tiyan ko.
"Looks like someone wanted some hug, too," nakangising turan ni Ryuichi bago ako siniilan ng halik at hinalikan rin maging tiyan ko. Para sa akin, sapat na iyon upang gumaan ang loob ko. Ryuichi does love me so I should not worry too much.
We decided to finish our bath ngunit natigilan na lamang ako nang may naramdaman akong kakaiba. I suddenly felt this sharp pain around my belly at kasunod noon ay ang unti-unti nitong panghihilab. I was confused on what to think dahil may mga panahong humihilab talaga ang tiyan ko but this today was way different.
I tried to calm myself down and took a deep exhale. Then I waited for any further contractions and how often it was. Ilang saglit pa ay nakaramdam na naman ako ng isang biglaang sakit at saka ko naramdamang may umaagos na sa mga hita ko.
"My water broke…" I muttered to myself, looking down at my feet and saw gushes of slime-like and clear liquid coming out from my behind mixed with little blood. "Ryuichi…" may kaunting diin ang pagsambit ko sa kanyang pangalan.
Ryuichi quickly looked at me but my lower half was probably more noticeable than my frightened expression. "Oh, shit!" Napamura siyang bigla at nagmadaling kumuha ng tuwalya at binalot ito sa akin.
Slowly but surely, inalalayan n'ya ako hanggang makarating kami sa sala. Pinaupo n'ya ako sa couch, kumuha ng mga unan at saka nilagay ang mga ito sa likod ko at tagiliran upang matulungan akong mag-relax. Then he hurriedly went upstairs. I heard loud thuds coming from our room as if he was bumping onto some hard things. Sa pagkakataong iyon ay batid ko nang natataranta na si Ryuichi.
When he got back, nakapagbihis na siya at may dala na rin itong damit para sa akin. He even got the baby bag that I have prepared ahead sakaling kabuwanan ko na… and it's finally happening.
"Breathe, Kazuki. Breathe," he instructed me habang tinutulungan akong magbihis.
"You're the one who needs to breathe," pabalang ko namang tugon at nakuha ko pang matawa sa aligagang reaksyon ni Ryuichi.
"Fuck! This is no time to laugh, Kazuki. You're going into labor!" kabado n'yang turan at nang mabihisan na n'ya ako ay maingat n'ya akong inalalayan patayo. After he brought me in his car, tumakbo siya pabalik at saka kinuha ang lahat ng kakailanganin ko. He was both excited and frantic.
"Argh," isang impit na nasasaktang ungol ang bigla kong napakawalan nang tumindi ang panghihilab ng aking tiyan. It was getting more and more frequent.
"You're going to be okay. Trust me," aniya at pagkatapos ay binuhay n'ya ang makina ng kotse saka ito pinatakbo nang mabilis.
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Pagdating namin sa hospital ay inasikaso ni Ryuichi ang lahat habang ako naman ay isinugod sa emergency room. He reassured me that he will come with me and even watch me deliver our child. The idea kind of annoyed me because I didn't want him to see me giving birth but the pain I'm experiencing right now was more intense.
They examined my condition first in order to determine whether I'm going to have a normal delivery or cross section. Since my body was sensitive to any kind of stress, the doctors told me that I better have cross section delivery to ensure my safety and my baby's life. Kahit na tutol si Ryuichi dahil natatakot ito sa maaaring mangyari sa akin ay pumirma pa rin siya.
The doctor and nurses prepared everything for the operation habang ako naman ay inip na sa kakahintay.
"Kazuki, are you okay? Do you need water? I can't go with you pero maghihintay lang ako dito. I promise," sunud-sunod n'yang wika.
Dala na rin ng sakit at kainipan na matapos na ang paghihirap ko ay bigla ko siyang namura ng wala sa oras. "Will you shut the fuck up?!" Pinanlakihan ng mga mata si Ryuichi. Ilang sandali pa ay nandiyan na ang doktor na oopera sa akin at nakangising tinapik si Ryuichi sa balikat.
"He's fine. That happens when they are in labor. Don't worry," pagpapakalma ng doktor kay Ryuichi.
Nang masigurong handa na ako para sa gagawing operasyon, Ryuichi gave me a kiss.
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RYUICHI
"OH, FUCK. Fuck," hindi mapakali kong mura habang paikot-ikot ako sa labas ng operating room.
I hope Kazuki's okay and that everything is going well. Ayokong mag-isip ng masama pero talagang hindi ko maiwasang mag-alala. His entire pregnancy was a struggle. Any careless actions may lead to miscarriage kaya sobrang naging maingat ako sa kanya. I know that he's strong but I'm not sure if I was giving him enough emotional support.
"Ah, he's gonna cry." halos sumabog naman ang ulo ko sa inis nang marinig ang nakakabuwisit na boses ng baliw na doktor and I clicked my tongue when our eyes met.
"Paano mo nalaman?" I suddenly asked because I was sure that I haven't called or texted anyone.
"Kicchan texted me. Sabi n'ya, 'Acchan, tulungan mo ako. Manganganak na ako pero si Ryuichi parang aligagang aso na hindi alam ang gagawin'," said the freak na umarte pa na lalong nagpabaliw sa kanya.
"As if I believe you."
"I am not telling you to believe me. Besides, si Kicchan ang ipinunta ko dito at excited na akong ma-meet si junior Kicchan!" pambabalewala n'ya sa akin at kinilig na lamang sa ideyang malapit na n'yang makilala ang magiging anak namin ni Kazuki pero iba naman ang naging epekto ng huli n'yang sinabi sa akin.
"You're such a dickhead," inis kong kausap sa aking sarili.
"And you think like one," mabilis n'yang ganti sa akin habang naghuhugis puso ang mga mata nito dahil sa sabik na makita ang baby.
Hindi ko na lang siya pinatulan pa at nagpatuloy sa paghihintay.
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After hours of anxious waiting ay nagtagumpay ang operasyon. I was told that I can already see Kazuki but the baby still needs to be checked kaya mamaya ko pa siya makikita.
When I entered the room, nandoon na si Kazuki. He was conscious and he smiled the moment he saw my face. Himala namang tahimik na sumunod sa akin ang baliw na apat ang mata at natuwa din si Kazuki sa kanyang pagdating.
"Kazuki…" I called out his name and gently brushed my hand on his forehead.
"I did it," mahina n'yang pakli.
"Yeah," sang-ayon ko naman at masuyong hinaplos ang kanyang pisngi.
"He was so beautiful, Ryuichi," aniya Kazuki at bigla na lamang siyang naluha sa tuwa. "When they pulled him out, he didn't cry so I began to worry but the doctor said that he was very healthy," pagbibigay-alam nito.
"Talaga?" sabi ko na lang dahil wala akong masabi sa labis na saya. I, too, was itching to meet my son for the first time.
"Congratulations, Kicchan. You were so brave," biglang singit ng baliw.
"Thank you for coming here, Aki," nasisiyahang saad ni Kazuki sa kaibigan.
"Of course. Anything… for you," he almost whispered that response.
Ilang sandali pa ay dumating ang isang babaeng nurse na may kargang sanggol na panay ang ungol. "Heto na si baby!" nakangiti n'yang wika at pagkatapos ay maingat na pinatong ang sanggol sa dibdib ni Kazuki.
The moment the baby felt Kazuki's warmth, it quickly calmed down and stopped squirming. All of us that witnessed such a beautiful scene were all touched at hindi ko napigilang mapaiyak. Kazuki was already crying and so was the four-eyed freak. Even the nurse felt our happiness.
Ilang sandali pa ay dumating na rin ang doctor at tinapik akong muli sa balikat. "Congratulations! You're now a dad," he exclaimed and took my hands and shook them so happily.
"Thank you for everything," sabi ko sa doktor bago ko nilapitan si Kazuki at ang baby.
"We should give him a name," ani Kazuki.
"Yeah pero wala akong maisip," sabi ko naman habang sinisilip ang baby namin na komportableng-komportable sa piling ni Kazuki.
"How about 'Yuuki'?" Kazuki suggested.
"Yuuki?" I uttered, thinking why Kazuki chose that name.
"Hmm…" The four-eyed suddenly made a sound before fixing his eyeglasses. "Not bad. 'Yuu' means 'distant' and 'ki' means 'brightness'; distant brightness — Yuuki," he explained then he smiled in so much agreement. "It's a perfect name."
"Yes. You're my 'Yuuki'," Kazuki uttered while caressing our baby's back.
"Yuuki…" muli kong sambit at pagkatapos ay nangiti ako. "Yuuki."
We all welcomed Yuuki with warm hearts and smiles on our faces. This day was one of the best days of my life. Not only I got my only one Omega by my side, I also got to witness another blessing that's gonna bring us happiness in the future and always.
「END」