Chereads / Grey Lies / Chapter 22 - Whose Fault?

Chapter 22 - Whose Fault?

The next morning...

I wanted to clear my head so I decided to go jogging instead of the home gym. I really hate wearing this mask, I can't breathe in this thing. But then again, it would be a pain if someone recognized me. I push my hoodie back and continue running. What I heard from Drake yesterday really threw me off the hook. No wonder Claire pretends not to know me. I don't want to get back together (and I don't think she does either), I just want this misunderstanding and its root to be solved. It won't change the past but, it may change the future. Just as I'm thinking this, I spot a familiar back. Is that...

Ashton: Claire?

I cannot be wrong about this, especially after all those times she turned her back on me left. Wait, that's just sad (,not that that's important right now). She lives around here? I run a little faster to be meet her pace. I call out to her but she doesn't listen. Wait, she has earphones in. I wave my hand in front of her and she finally snaps back.

Claire: Woah!

She turns to look at me and her eyes widen.

Claire: You..!

She suppresses her voice before we draw attention.

Claire:... What're you doing here?

Ashton: Taking a run.

Claire: Here?

Ashton: No, there.

She rolls her eyes.

Claire:.. I meant, in this area?

Ashton: Yeah, I just moved nearby recently.

Claire: So I see.

Suddenly, I notice a speeding bicycle coming her way. It's going to hit her! I quickly pull her towards me.

Claire:..?! What're you up to-

*Swish!!*

The bicycle speeds just past us making her hair sway and luckily, without hurting any of us. Phew, that was a close one.

Claire:..!! What was that?!

She turns her head in the direction the bicycle went.

Ashton: Are you okay?

Claire: Y-Yeah.

She puts her hands on my chest and pushes me away slightly, her cheeks a little red. Oh right, I shouldn't have acted without thinking it through; she's my Ex and an engaged woman. I make some distance between us as well.

Claire: Well then, I'll get goin-

Ashton: Can I talk to you about something?

She turns to leave but I stop her. I should let her know the truth. I look at her earnestly and she looks back at me surprise.

Claire:.. I'm sorry, but I should really get going or I'll be late for work.

Ashton: It's 6:30 a.m. right now. I'm sure most offices start by 9 o'clock. You could at least spare a few minutes.

Claire:.. Fine but, can we move elsewhere?

She glances at a few passerbys who've started suspecting my identity. She's right, we'll draw rumours if we talk about 'that thing' here. We move to a quieter place and take a seat on one of the benches. I slide my mask down.

Claire: So... what did you wanted to talk about? If it's about the interview, you can tell me that tomorrow.

Ashton: Actually, I can't tell you this until you admit that you're only pretending to have forgotten me.

Claire:..! I.. I don't know what you're talking about.

Ashton: Just, just stop all this please. I don't want this either. All I want to say is that we have a misunderstanding between us.

Claire: There's no misunderstanding in the slightest way. Everything is loud and clear, okay? And I don't want to talk about this or anything with a person like you.

Her personality just changed drastically.

Ashton:... I just want to say that 8 years ago-

Claire: Stop it! I said that I don't want to talk about it!

She stands up but I grab her hand before she can leave.

Ashton: Just let me tell you this and I'll stay away from you afterwards.

Claire:...

Ashton: Taking your silence as an 'okay', I want you to know that 8 years ago, after we broke up, whoever told you anything that was 'a message from me', lied. I didn't have the slightest clue of the situation until yesterday, when I met Drake. I would've never wanted you to get hurt. I only want you to understand this.

Claire:...

I let go of her hand and look down at my feet. She quietly turns away from me and starts walking.

Claire:... I understand.

That's all she says in an emotionless tone before leaving. I lift my head to look at her back as she goes farther and farther just like I did on that evening 8 years ago. I've let you go for the second time now but this time, my heart feels a little at peace knowing that the misunderstanding has been lifted. Wait, I never really asked her who did all this. However, I told her that I would leave her alone, and I should stick to it. I turn towards the way we came, put my mask back on and walk home, finally putting the past behind me.

Meanwhile,..

*Click*

I close the door and lean against it. The tears which I'd been holding back flow freely in isolation. 8 years, for so long, I've loathed the person I loved the most for a misunderstanding? Why would that person, who's so close to him, hold a grudge against us? I knew by his tone that he wasn't lying. He may be a famous actor now but, I've known him the best even before he was scouted by the Junior Actors's League. If he lied, I would be the first one to see through it.

My heart aches. Why? I hated him, right? Then, why do I feel so hurt for doing so now? Was it hatred that I felt or my heart preventing me from being hurt by him again? I should've never left him when that person persuaded me to. I was tricked into that vicious trap and hurt us both. It was all... my fault. But if I hadn't left him, he wouldn't be who he is right now, he would've given up on the offer to learn acting overseas.

Even as I say this, it only feels as though I'm convincing myself that I wasn't being stupid to make such a decision. If I told him the truth 8 years ago and told him to leave without breaking his heart, would things have been different now? I crumple down on the floor and cry over my stupid mistakes. If only we could redo the past...