Chereads / The True Meaning Of Beauty / Chapter 12 - Diary

Chapter 12 - Diary

[aged 13]

Amanda was going through a lot. her parents, for starters, were going through a divorce, and although her mom told her it wasn't her fault, she still blamed it on herself somehow, convincing herself it WAS her fault that they divorced in the first place.

Amanda's Mother was always a loving and caring Mom, who told her otherwise. her dad? not so much. "Hey honey, you can write in a diary, to write down all your feelings, like a paper therapist, Mom said.

"Thanks Mom, Amanda said. She nodded."Of course, i think you needed one." Amanda laughed."Maybe." She grabbed the diary, and went upstairs, maybe it WOULD help her, actually. She didn't think she'd ever need one, but here she was, about to write her first entry.

Dear Diary,

A lot is happening and I'm not sure i can deal with it, Summer has arrived and i turn 14 soon, so that is awesome, but my parents have just divorced and now i see my dad almost every weekends.

He had never been a good dad to me, that was why i stuck with Mom, but the court didn't ask me what i wanted, and that was to stay with Mom. Tomorrow, i have to go to Dad's house and see him and his new pregnant wife, i'm not complaining, she's a very nice woman and maybe, she doesn't deserve Dad, but i am going to have a half-sibling, and i'm not sure how i feel about it, though.

My Stepmother has always been kind to me, so it's not like i totally hate Dad's house. I miss Clarissa, though, she moved away over 2 months ago, and i miss her very much actually.

As for me, my life has been somewhat okay, i'm not sure if it's definitely awesome but it's in-between. Mom recently got me this and according to her, costed $4.10, cheap i suppose, for a diary.

It looks good, so it definitely was cheap for a diary, and looks new as well. For some strange reason, I can't help but think about what my life could have been if Clarissa was still in this town, and hanging with me.

Maybe we'd be still super close.

I'm not sure, though, she is way more beautiful than i am, and would probably rather be with someone at her standard, honestly. I should go now, Mom's calling for me.

Signed,

Amanda.

P.S Mom sometimes annoys me i guess.

[Amanda POV]

"Amanda, dinner, Mom said, sternly. I came downstairs and Mom was waiting as i sat down and started to eat. "So, do you like your diary? Mom asked me. I nod."I wrote my first entry already, it's pretty sweet, thank you, mom."

"Of course."

We ate in silence after that, which wasn't awkward because we were already super close. After dinner and cleaning up, I went to my room and sighed, scribbling on a sketchbook that i had. a bunch of my drawings and art hung up on my walls.

I started to scribble, until i drew out a girl, she didn't look like anyone i knew, but a random girl that probably existed and i didn't know. I felt proud, though, and started to color the drawing.

I finished coloring and taped it onto the wall, i maybe had a lot on my wall, Some of my oldest drawings/art were from when i was 3 or 4, and that is commitment. I think i've always liked art from when i was born, even. Mom always said i was a creative child, and i''d like to see myself that way.

I soon yawned, and that meant i was tired so i just changed into pajamas and fell asleep.