Sorry, I just had to ask that dont you hate having a crush! I mean seriously! One day you tell your crush you like them and they say they like you back.... but when they really don't. You met up every morning at the same spot you agreed to met on but then get your heartbroken in pieces. You get a kiss, you feel the lie. You see their eyes, and you see your world, and when they're gone..... your just lonely and lost without then near you. After class they tend to kiss you and you fall more in love with them... when they start to fall out. You know there playing with your feelings when you ask them to met up after school and they say "it's up to you" and you said "sure" but 5 minutes later you get a text say "sorry I cant met up" and you get another one saying "sorry I meant I dont want to met up" and that's when you type and say "why?" and they said "because I dont want to". That breaks you. Having someone say they love you and then they turn around and slam your heart right back in your face. Making it harder for you to forget about them. You see then everyday and they try to talk to you. and what do you do? You still talk to then instead of ignoring them. Your friends tell you "you can do better" but you know you can you just dont want too... you want them. You never got fed up with them. You love how you are with them. They changed you but you're too afraid to really let go of them because that will cause you more suffering than pain. Love doesnt exists. I give up on love and on myself for being so foolish but.... heres what I do known That if he does want to met up I'll go back again and get broken all over again. When you dont see them you feel so happy, but you feel sad. You want them to hold you and never let go! Most of all you want them to have the same feelings you do. I guess I'm going off topic but that's fine. When your ready upset at yourself you tend to go on.... For example like me of I cry or if I get so mad i laugh, no matter what! I cannot be serious because in that type of person who hides away things because I have been broken too many times to let someone else come in and hurt me more. It sucks having a heart... it sucks having feelings, and it sucks that you have to go through lessons to find out who you really are. I dont want lessons, I dont want anything... I want my happiness with this person! but I cant. Their to different from. They like to joke around.... A LOT! I tend to be more serious, but when I was alone they came in and got me off the floor. Their eyes so sure that they will be there. Their grasp makes you feel like you can reach the stars and come back, but all you will have is a cloud at your lap. You just wanna laugh and cry, because your know for a moment your safe eventually not all things have a end. No day is the same. All our feelings and our hearts have been hurted and what do we do? We sit back and watch it happen. Hoping one day just perhaps one day we will smile once again. Not even words can describe how I angry, how I sad, and how disappointed I am. I wanna cry and run away but I wanna stay and face them! maybe then I will get the answers I need... instead of my Hope's up.
do you face the same problem? If soo.... I really need help, I'm losing my mind on this...