"Who's the Tater Gang?"asked Tony
"Our evil overlords, they kidnapped all of us to dig potatoes until the ends of our miserable lives. We have to travel in groups of two or more just to make sure we don't get eaten by creatures in the woods."Scar whispered the next words in Tony's ears "That's why I travel with Johnny Cakes he runs slower with that gimpy leg. While the pigs are eating him I can gain distance...Hare Lip would be a good choice snatch the baby doll out of his hands and throw it towards the pig he will do anything to save his waifu."
Hare Lip was singing the Sound of Muzak at the top of his lungs with the rest of his brothers as he broke the earth.
"So everbody is a prisoner?How long have you been here?"
"Just try to forget about days,forget about hope it makes the time go by quicker." Scar jubilantly exclaimed. "1 potato 2 potato 3 potato 4 .5 potato 6 potato give papa more!"
The brothers tossed the harvest to the side in unison. Their choreography in military precision .
'I am pleasantly surprised that the brothers are doing work for a change.' Three was watching her tater slaves hard at work. 'Nobody to bully...nothing to grouse about.This day is pretty boring but most days usually are.'
*Back at the Junk Hall
"I don't understand it at all. No matter how hard I turn the horns they don't seem to be going any further inwards."Jimbo had worked up a decent sweat before he gave up." I will now tell you the history of our kinfolk. After the giant beer can was thrown from Big Pappa John John's space pickup truck window and landed in orbit here because of magnets and shit. The human race was born. The first man we call Adam decided to build the world's first Herly out of some square rocks and some branchess. Adam's lizard tail kept getting run over by the back tire rock so he bashed his tail off with another rock solving that problem, then promptly died. Luckily for us he had relations with a manatee securing the future of the human race. The location of the consummation of their lust is a place called Daytona. It is a sacred site where a young Gypsie virgin is fed Veegra Fruit and thrust upon a manatee to insure the continuation of the human race in case of infertility curses being cast by the foul spacemen that want our holy beer can mother." Jimbo reached his hand out and snatched on the pot handle on Joe's head.
"No falling asleep Grubworm. I'll lie to Drunkle LaLa tell him you are a virgin so it's you in the mermaid grotto."
"Mermaids don't sound so bad."
"It's hard to phase you isnt it?"
Joe looked back at the Tinker with cold deadset eyes."It's been a rough couple days I don't think anything can phase me after what I've been through."
"Ever heard the story of Fremmy Rimmrod?"
Joe was regaled with every asinine Junk Gypsie folk tale there was tales of the Swamp Wammpus, a forty foot tall horned rabbut that pissed acid. The Weebelo, a giant hairy creature that tried to sell you cookies that tasted like charcoal. Apple Jack, a friendly earth sprite that offered fresh squeezed apple cider to anyone wandering the forest, he expects payment afterwards and violates you if you can't pay his exorbitant fees so best not to take juice from strange men in the woods.Every story had a lesson usually the lesson was avoid anything that sounds like it's a good deal especially Juice Burger Corporation. It was a conglomerate with ties to financial and food service sectors.
Then it was more senseless conspiracy theories about how the corporations were putting mind control drugs in the food and that's what was sparking a trend towards organic sourced food.