"What the--?" I stepped back into the living room with a simple plate of bacon and toast with a creamy, buttery, almost custard-like layer of egg spread on top when I was greeted to an unusual site.
Mary was sitting beside Minnie and lightly tickling the underside of her chin with a finger while her other hand rubbed the younger woman's belly.
I heard soft purring and nearly lost my shit.
"This woman...she's really treating the girl as a pet!" I muttered under my breath, which was still caught by Mary's sharp ears. The corner of her eyes softened ever-so-slightly.
"I've always wanted a little girl like her." She admitted. " Vera was always so mature, she never let me spoil her. And Basil was such a boy, always off on some misadventure with you. I never really got a chance to play with them like this." The woman's eyes wandered off, as if embarrassed. "Not that doing things like this fit my character anyway, I suppose."
"Says who? It's hella cute seeing you spoil her." Granted, if they weren't wearing clothes it'd be ten thousand times better. But there was an innocent light-heartedness in how Mary played with her, like pinching a sleeping baby's chubby cheeks and wanting to snuggles them.
"Besides, I totally get it. I remember laying with Dolly and fighting the urge to mess with her when she was sleeping, too, once upon a time. She still has the most adorable little snores."
I never knew Mary was missing out on such a great thing. " Vera was a little cutie too, what with her chubby cheeks and everything. Remember how she'd try to munch on her toes when she was teething?"
I got a strange look. "You actually remember that?"
"I have very good memory," I tried to play it off.
"....Hm. I suppose Dragon children really are different. I wonder if Dolly has similar memories. It would explain why she's so attached to you. If I remember right, you took care of her a lot. " She reminisced.
"Father threw me to a boar and Mother was always a bit weird herself."
She chuckled. "Your mother nearly castrated him for that. He was watching over you, though. He spent the entire time keeping an eye on you to make sure you were safe."
"I'm sure he enjoyed my performance, yes." I fell on my ass several times. I KNEW I could hear laughing back then. So he was there, the bastard. "Those two just aren't qualified to be raisin' a daughter. I caught Father letting Dolly play with a knife once. And Mother was whispering that weird language in her ear and later on when I was playing with Dolly she set a tree on fire. I wasn't about to let them spend much alone time with her after that. I had to take care of her."
"Yes. Vera was always jealous of that." Mary mused. "She ended up not liking Baz since he always smothered her so much, conversely. That's why she started acting out, because she wanted your attention."
I sat the plate down and took a seat opposite her. "Yeah, I get that now. But it's like you said, you know? She was always so mature. I remember once when she was....five? Six?...and asking her to put some books away for me while I went to go do something real quick. I came back a few minutes later and she had my entire bookshelf alphabetized and separated by genre. After that it just never felt right treating her like other kids."
Vera had been quiet and solemn as a child, very serious. She was alway pretty helpful. You never had to worry about her because she was just that grown up. I guess that's why I never paid much attention to her. She was just so much more capable and independent than Baz and Dolly so I trusted her to watch after herself. Mary must've felt the same, though for different reasons than I did since she knew Vera had a mental age that didn't match her physical one.
It was never that I didn't like her as much as the other two, but that she was just lower maintenance.
"She was probably trying to impress you back then." The woman sighed. "And I suppose it's my fault she started acting out like she did. I don't have any experience in attracting a man's attention beyond being pretty, after all. Knowing how to be lovable was never a skill I picked up. What else was she to do?"
"I don't know," I said, "You seem plenty lovable. You and Vee both."
"Indeed? How so, with faces like ours?"
"That has nothing to do with it. So what if you have a bit of a cold exterior? To begin with they have to want to know you and really try for it. Take me, for example. I think slowly digging and finding all the things that make you two lovable is always going to be worth the effort. Anyone who thinks it's not just doesn't deserve the privilege of knowing how great you are."
Mary and Vee are Kuuderes Supreme. If you're too much of a pansy ass little bitch and can't put in the effort to get to know the people they are beneath their poker faces then that's just your own damn loss.
She softened even more and a faint arc formed on her lips. " You always have such nice words." The smile faded. " I truly wish I had met you first."
"Even though I'm nuts?"
"Even then."
"Well damn. You shouldn't have said that. Now I want to kiss you." I then got a better idea. "Actually, why don't you be the one to take the lead this time?"
She shook her head. "Kissing outside of sex is no good."
"What? Why?" I was flabbergasted. What is this bullshit?
"I am not so shameless as to take advantage of your affection like that."
"....Uh...I don't think I understand."
She clasped her hands and placed them neatly between her laps. "Young Master, you have a rather unconditional liking towards me yet don't ask for mine in return. It's generous but that's why I can't just kiss you. I don't want to give you ones I don't mean. Understand now? When you kiss me, you do so with a warm honesty and care. It's wrong for me to kiss you when I can't do the same."
"Okay?" I said, not sure if it was a question or a statement. "Since when was kissing so complicated…?" I wondered aloud.
"Our relationship has been purely physical from the start, " She continued. "I don't have any right to enjoy your affection outside of the bedroom. You should save these sorts of words for Vera. She's the one who loves you."
"Trust me I'm going to pelt her with words of love and affection. But you deserve them too. I already made it clear I don't mind if you don't love me right now. Couples usually don't start that way in the first place. I just want to treat you right. You don't have to feel bad about kissing me. If you want to, go ahead. If you don't, fine. I'll kiss you instead. Or are you saying before you kiss me, I have to finger you first? Because I will do that." I could just feel the gleam in my eye. Oh yeah. No problems with that condition at all. "All you have to do is come sit on my lap. I love hearing trees sing."
"Ahem." Bubbles audibly coughed. "Can you guys, like, not? I'm still in the room, alright? Don't just flirt like I'm not around, oi."
"I don't mind." I replied evenly.
The girl cursed. "Well fuck, I do!"
"Heh, that ain't my problem. Anyway, fine. Rain check?"
"...Was that Baz I heard a while ago? I should go see her." Mary was red from ears to neck and very deliberately walked out of the room.
I think even she forgot Bubbles was around judging from that reaction.
"You really are a dangerous fellow." Bubbles folded her arms. "I hate seeing you do that."
"Do what?"
"Say that kind of stuff. Like come on. Do you even really mean them? You can't seriously be that magnanimous. I mean you do understand she's just using you for sex, don't you? She's nice to you, but it's not as if she cares beyond you being her Mistress' son and her daughter's boyfriend. Even more than that, what kind of guy is actually alright with a girl he likes being in love with someone else?"
I pointed my thumbs at my chest. "This guy." I stated. "Also, hey, I always mean what I say when I'm talking to beautiful women I like.
"Could've fooled me." She said, bone-dry.
"And why is that?
"Oh, I just seem to recall you saying equally nice sweet nothings during our honeymoon. That's all."
"Then you're making a fool of your own yourself, because they weren't nothing. I meant everything I said about you at the time."
"Yeah, right." She walked over and snatched a slice of bacon from Minerva's still-untouched plate and started chewing morosely.
"I'm serious."
"Bullshit. Why am I the only one left out of this little setup of yours then?"
"Fuck, do you seriously want to be in it?" Girls shouldn't be that damn convenient, alright?
"Well, no," She admitted. Finally. Common sense, at last. "But it would've made me feel better if you didn't just drop me. That night we came here together, that little back-and-forth of ours? I thought we were...I don't know...something. I mean, weren't we? Then we just said our goodbyes and I'm all happy thinking we're doing great, you know? But when I show up again it's like you don't even want me around or like I'm a bother and It just makes me feel like I shouldn't have come back at all. I'm not even sure you would care if you never saw me again." Her eyelids shuddered. She looked like she was trying to blink away tears. " So sorry if I get a little upset seeing you doing the exact same thing with other women that you did with me. Next time I'll just keep my mouth shut. "
Ah. Dammit. We're really hashin' this out, are we? Fuck. I hate this kind of thing. I thought we were fine with the short talks we already had about it, but apparently she had a lot more grievances tucked away than she let on.
Okay. Alright. My turn.
Deep breath….and go
"First, knock off your shit." I started slowly. " I said this several times already, but it's not MY fault if YOUR FEELINGS changed halfway through. We both knew what we were getting into. It was just going to be some fun just between the two of us for the special occassion, but even then we didn't actually have sex because I didn't want to take it that far, thus I feel no obligations. I loved every second with you during that time, but I never said I wanted anything more than that and I never said I was falling for you. Second, I'm sorry, " I apologized. " I'm not always great with keeping in touch with people or making them feel welcome. But that doesn't mean I don't like having you around. Come on though, I mean you literally told me you wanted to seduce me and break my heart and I'm not gonna make a big fuss about that--if you have the ability, go ahead--but please understand that I'm well within my right to put a little distance between us for it. Which I actually haven't done. I wouldn't have minded if you wanted to hang out at all. All you had to do was ask. Third, I did mean what I said back then. You're pretty great. You're fun, sexy, smart. Just an all around joy to be with. I like you. Hell, after that honeymoon thing if you actually came out and asked if we could have a real go at being a couple I probably would've agreed at that point. But no, you never said anything like that so what the hell do you expect me to do? You know I was interested in someone else. That means you have to take initiative, because while I may have agreed to have a date or two I'm not gonna just suddenly switch targets without good reason."
"It's like you knew there was already this vague atmosphere around us and you were just hoping that if you didn't say anything it'd evolve into something else all on its own. You tried to keep the status quo, but that isn't how shit gets done son. You can't just stay silent and hope a relationship forms naturally. I, at least, don't leave things to that kinda toxic ambiguity. Other than that, it was just bad timing. You're open about this now, but you weren't then. And Vera? She literally gave herself to me. That's fucking initiative. That's why I chose to be with her. Because I realized how cute she was and how much she liked me and neither you nor Minerva ever showed me anything like that." It was hard to win against something that, but like I said it just came down to bad timing and a lack of communication.
Maybe Minnie would've taken some initiative herself too eventually...but I never hid my intentions with her and she just kept banging her head against walls because she thought liking me was somehow a sin or something.
"So again, I'm sorry. I think you're awesome, but even if you tell me all this now and want to ask for a shot at making this fake marriage thing real someday--in more than just a legal perspective--it's already a bit too late. I mean what, are you sure you want to be involved with me like that? I'm not going to give up on Vera or Mary. I can't say I absolutely wouldn't choose you over them because I don't like saying absolutes when it comes to people's feelings, but I can tell you right now it would still be damn near impossible. A real upward battle. You're better off finding someone else. Please find someone else."
I didn't bring up how just as she accused Mary of just using me, this whole thing began because she wanted to use me too. I didn't mind that, but the hypocrisy was a little off-putting. Her emotions are running high so I can't blame her for it though.
"But I don't want to find someone else." Her tone turned bitter. "Why do I have to? I had you before any of them. Why do I have to be the one to let go?"
Yo. This fish...she's stubborn.
"Christ. Did you hear nothing of what I just said? Why the hell are you being so stubborn?!" I felt the need to rub my temples. "I'm already in a relationship! Twice over!"
"If someone you liked was already in a relationship with someone, what would you do?"
"Alls fair in love and war." I quoted before I could stop myself, then wanted to kick my teeth in.
"Exactly." She smiled. "So you get it then."
"You are putting effort into something that most likely won't end up rewarding at all."
"I don't believe that. I think you're worth it." She repeated my own words towards Mary and sent them right back at me.
"No! I'm not!" I protested. " I'm seriously, 100%, objectively not worth it at all! I'm a terrible person whose only thing I got going for me is my face and maybe my cock, but that's it! Please just spend your time going after someone else. It's a way better option. Why the hell are you going to waste sweat on someone who already has two girlfriends?!"
"Because the one I want is you! What's it to you?! Just shut up and let me seduce you already!"
Satan's fat furry nutsack, this is ridiculous. Just because you want someone, doesn't mean you should just mindlessly pursue them. What the hell is this girl talking about? Is there really no one else who could do? Ugh.
I'm tired. I feel like nothing was accomplished by this conversation at all. "Why?So you can dump me and stomp on my feelings?"
"Well….yes! M-maybe...I don't know." The blushing woman brought her index fingers together nervously, not daring to look me in the eye.
Son of a bitch. She was cute. I hate that she's so cute right now.
I gave her a harsh stare. I had one last card up my sleeve.
"I'm going to be destroying the realm purely due to my own selfish and unreasonable justifications. Is that the kind of person you want?"
"...Excuse me. Sorry. You said you're going to do what now?"