I wish I could have said that, as a mature adult, as an older brother, as a calm hunter, I had reacted well to the news, that I stayed calm and asserted the situation in a very mature way.
But I didn't.
I got so angry that I lashed out on everybody, on everything, so furious that my blood seemed to be as thick as ink and my muscles tensed up, and yet at the same time my mind was blank of thoughts, as if so overtaken by my anger that all I could do was feel, react and let that livid boiling feeling control my actions.
Because God knew that I could not afford to think, I could not stop to ponder and wonder what could be happening to my brother right at this moment, the fear, the anguish, what they could be doing to him, or already done even; or rather, if he was still even alive at this point.
