I'm not completely careless, I clumse from time to time but I have regard for the wellbeing of those around me. I didn't intentionally put me or Vera in harm's way. I couldn't have.
I considered everything from the scene back then - the flies, the scraps of bandages, the empty bottles, I tried my best to put two and two together. Before the idea of resuming our game even came up, I already had explanations, I'd already thought of a few scenarios including the absolute worst - or at least the worst that I could think of, but even then, I still believed that no one could possibly enter Maywood with the intent of harming civilians - let alone children, let alone two nobles.
No one enters the woods without going through a resistance outpost for inspection, this is an irrefutable fact. I had complete trust in the five outposts and the soldiers stationed in them, this too is fact. I believed that they were capable enough to sniff out potential criminals and quell them, that much credit I gave.
But now I think that maybe I shouldn't have given them that much credit, that maybe I should stop placing my trust on people entirely; because right now - a mere ten minutes after convincing myself that we'd be fine, I feel like I might be staring at the final stinking piece of the puzzle I thought I'd already solved.
It was a short distance away from the camp, me and Vera ran into it. I could feel chills coming down my spine as we stare at it - damned if it isn't foreboding.
"Cart.." Vera tells me silently, her eyes widening unnaturally, her lips totally pale and her entire face almost completely frozen.
It's a merchant cart, specifically. Something about it just screams wrong. The aura exuding from it is nothing if ominous, but I've already resolved myself to look and see what's inside. I have to know for sure if we're in any trouble or not. This was my fault to begin with. I should've dropped the game the moment I tripped.
My left hand clenched in a fist, my right hand grabbing onto Vera's sleeve, I begin the arduous approach.
"What's that smell?" I ask Vera as we near the cart - or, rather, as I near the cart dragging her with me. She doesn't answer back. What I'd do to hear one of her quips now.
As we inch closer and closer towards it, I start hearing a cacophony of unpleasant noises coming from inside. My mind keeps telling me that I already know what's in there, but I have to see this through. I want to see - no, I want to be wrong. Please let me be wrong.
"Adie, I'm scared" she tells me. You and me both, Vera.
We made it, though. We're right here. It's right in front of us.
My hands full of sweat, my entire body shaking - I start pulling at the handle to try to open the cart's wooden flap. I give it a few good tugs - no good.
So with all my strength, I give it one final, forceful yank and.. THERE! I manage to force it open and - akh! insects - dammit, not even a second after popping the cart open, a swarm of insects start coming out. Unable to check on what's inside yet, my focus shifts onto the swarm - I'm being set aback. I start covering my face with one arm to block out the pests and flailing the other to drive them away.
"GODS!" Vera yells, flailing her arms about as well. We're driving them back, at least.
I can feel my face and arms being stung, damned if they manage a way inside our orifices.
But they begin to disperse after a few seconds, much to our relief.. but what replaces the pests is the unpleasant smell we'd only caught whiffs of a while ago, it's starting to envelop the whole place - it's absolutely atrocious, enough to make me want to pass out. Gods.
Smell aside though, this is it. It's time to take a look.. It's time.
All at once - I can feel it all at once; fear, hesitance, it's all palpable. I feel nauseous, like throwing up, I don't want to be here, but still - my hands shaking uncontrollably, phantom piss running down my tights, I will myself into taking a peak.
I wasn't wrong - in fact, it was exactly as I thought. I can feel my insides being churned the more I stare at this abomination. I back away from the cart - it's all that I could do.. I..
"Gods!" I blurt out, horrified as I stumble on another damned pebble behind me, landing square on my back. It hurts.
I feel like I'm in a haze. Am I reeling on the ground? I maybe am. It's all just too much - the image, the smell, all of it is just too much for me, I couldn't have - Gods. GODS. I feel like a river's about to gush out of my mouth, I can't hold it.
Unable to control the inevitable, vomit starts rushing from out my mouth - at first, only a smidgen, but then, buckets. A few seconds more and I think I'll have vomited enough to fill a small puddle.
"Gods.. GODS!!" I try to blurt out as the gushing subsides, vomit still dripping from my mouth, my hand still gripping my chest.
"Adie.." Vera tries to tell me, her voice shaking. I guess she must've seen it already.
I look back at her; she's absolutely mortified - her eyes are close to bursting out, her body is totally stiff, even stiffer than before, and she's twitching - almost uncontrollably. I've never seen that look on her face before, I've never seen her visibly shaken like that.
"It's a corpse" she lets out in but a trembling whimper.
Too much. I couldn't clear my head, too many thoughts but none to cling to - too many raging emotions but none remain constant. It's like there's a storm in my head - no, a raging inferno.
My father once told me that my inner strife is meaningless to those who could care less. I don't why these words of his are suddenly occurring to me now.. Wait-
Am I hearing things right? Maybe it's just the nausea? Do I hear rustling - footsteps? Shit. I think they're footsteps. No.. no, they definitely are.
Before we could even get a chance to collect ourselves, the footsteps start to grow more audible. They're faint still but headed our way. God's, what have I done.
"Vera we need to run" I yell at her, forcing myself to stand up. She's completely motionless.
I yank her and start running. I don't know if she's even conscious but she's keeping up with my pace as best she can - I feel like I'm dragging a carcass. I guess am about to see the truth in my father's words. What have I done?
"Vera! Vera! Wake up!" I try yelling at her. "Vera, snap out of it!!"
I don't know when to quit. The trait is both a blessing and a curse. And right now, dead in the middle of the silent woods, I think I might have cursed us both.