The hospital was bustling with both patients and visitors, as well as the healthcare providers. Even then, in one particular ward, the atmosphere inside was so quiet as if there was no one in the private ward.
Ren carefully pulled up the quilt to cover his wife. Guilt and worry filled his dark eyes. His entire face appeared haggard. Even his hair was in a mess, unlike his usual neat style.
"Hiss..."
Ren frowned as he accidentally moved his left hand in an abrupt way. He glanced at the place where his arm was bandaged. A patch of red blood stained the white gauze.
He pressed his temples with his right hand. He had never expected this kind of thing would happen.
When he saw the mother was shouting for help as the baby stroller got to the center of the road, Ren didn't think much. He just reacted according to the situation.
It was a dangerous time. If he didn't act swiftly as he thought, he might already be crashed by the car.
The baby was safe. The mother cried while thanking him furiously yet...
His wife was terribly shocked by the incident.
The ambulance sent them to the nearest hospital, a few miles away from the foot of the mountain.
"Sweetheart," Ren brushed the back of his hand over her pale cheek, "I'm sorry."
Even though he did it to save the baby, Ren still felt guilty. Especially when the doctor who treated Tsubaki warned him to be careful of his wife's mental state once she regained her consciousness.
It was a momentary shock but it could blow a high impact to Tsubaki. Moreover, she was in a fragile state with her being pregnant.
Their families had been informed. All of them were surprised but Ren managed to calm them down. He promised to immediately contact them again after everything had stabilized.
Ren kept sitting on the chair by the bedside. He refused to leave his wife even for a second. It had been close to three hours since Tsubaki fainted. The sky was still bright outside but to him, his world was on the brink of darkness.
Wake up.
Please, sweetheart.
I'm sorry...
"...en..."
Ren jolted up.
Right in the line of his sight, Tsubaki was slowly opening her eyes.
"Sweetheart? Tsubaki? Do you hear me?"
"...Ren?"
"Yes! Yes! It's me!"
Ren was in a frenzy. He didn't know what should he do first. Then, his mind urged him to start calling for the doctor. His finger was anxiously pushing on the call button right above the bed.
The daze in Tsubaki's eyes slowly dispersed, regaining their clarity. She quietly stared at her husband who was worriedly looking at her.
"Sweetheart? Is there anywhere you feel uncomfortable? I've called the doctor. Hang on!"
Ren grew more anxious because he didn't understand the look she wanted to convey to him.
Her eyes appeared so deep, so unfathomable despite how calm she looked on the surface.
What was she thinking?
While Ren was disturbed by the way Tsubaki looked, she slowly lifted up her hands. In a really quiet voice, she murmured a word, "...Hug."
Ren's eyes flickered.
"En," He pursed his lips tight.
Ren bent down. He carefully brought his dear wife in his arms. Tsubaki's movement was so weak but she tightly clutched to his back.
"I'm glad you're safe."
In her voice, he thought he heard something nostalgic in it.
"I'm safe, sweetheart."
And, I'm sorry.
Soon, the doctor came. After a series of checkups, the doctor happily announced there was nothing wrong with the pregnant mother. Ren thanked the doctor before he focused back on his wife.
"I've called home, telling that you're fine. Mother, Grandma and the others are worried about you. Would you like to call them?"
Tsubaki gave him a light nod, "En."
Ren brought out his phone. He searched for his mother-in-law's number first. While he was doing so, Tsubaki was intently looking at him.
"What are you doing?" Ren didn't know if he should tease her or not. The situation was not proper even for a light joke.
"Looking at you," answered Tsubaki honestly.
Even though her face was as calm as always, it didn't escape his notice on how she was tightly clasping her hands together.
She wasn't calm. She just masked her feelings.
Thud.
The phone fell on the bed. Ren leaned forward and opened up his arms then brought her closer to him. The moment their bodies made a contact, her calm mask finally cracked.
The flooding of emotions that she tried to hold back broke through the dam.
Tsubaki cried out loud. Her cries filled the entire room.
"You stupid! How stupid you are! Smiling at me like that... hic... and jumped in front of the car next! Do you think you're immortal! Hic!"
Every time her word fell, she hit his chest. Her punch would never hurt him but, the appearance of her crying in despair sent thorns deep inside his heart until it bled.
"You don't know... How scared I was when... I saw the car crashed where you stood! I couldn't find you! There's blood... blood on the road... What if... What if..."
Tsubaki didn't finish her word. She was afraid that if she let the word flowed out of her mouth, it would become a reality.
The hand that was punching the sturdy chest fell on the mattress. Her loud wail turned into a silent cry.
"It's my bad... I'm sorry... I'm sorry, Tsubaki..."
There were no excuses to be made.
Ren repeatedly murmured words of apologies. He didn't stop to gently hold her in his arms, stroking her hair and bringing her more closer to him. Her tears formed a wet patch on his shirt. He ignored the wound that was torn open due to his action while embracing her.
In the end, Tsubaki fell asleep after she exhausting herself by crying. Ren wanted her to replenish her energy with eating but he didn't have the heart to disturb her once she was asleep.
Feeling helpless, he carefully lied her down on the bed before he did the same.
Even in her sleep, Tsubaki's grasp on his shirt was still tight.
Ren quietly took in every inch of her face.
She was still pale. He really hoped color would be restored to her face soon.
Ren resumed patting her back until the frequency gradually lessened. Following her, he too fell asleep.
The ward was filled with silence.
Tick... Tock...
The time continued ticking. When one of the bed's occupiers slowly woke up, it was already dark outside.
Tsubaki blinked her eyes a few times. She was caught in a daze at the sight of her husband sleeping next to her. The memories of the terrifying incident that happened today rushed back to her mind.
Tsubaki shook her head. The exhaustion was still evident in her eyes even after she slept for hours.
Slowly, Tsubaki lifted up Ren's hands that were embracing her from the back. With a hand to support her belly, Tsubaki looked around in the dimness of the room.
It was a standard private ward with a built-in washroom. Tsubaki quietly got out of the bed, afraid of waking Ren up with her movement.
Once she was inside, Tsubaki stared at her haggard appearance reflected in the mirror.
A pair of swollen eyes, a ghastly pale face, lips with no color...
She looked so bad.
Drip... Drip...
Tsubaki pressed both hands over her mouth. She didn't want to let out even the smallest sound yet her muffled sobs still echoed faintly in the washroom.
Her tears continued pouring from her eyes, slipping in between her fingers until they fell on the floor.
Tsubaki's legs weakened. She grasped on the edge of the sink before she slowly lowered her body. The coolness of the floor seeped into her skin.
He's safe... He's safe...
He wasn't in any danger...
She didn't lose him...
Like how she thought she did five years ago...
Tsubaki closed her eyes.
No matter if she wanted to or not, the memories of that night slowly emerged out from the deepest part of her mind.
Her tears fell again.