Tsubaki stared blankly at her hands that were holding a bowl under the running water of the kitchen sink. She didn't move for a few minutes straight as the coolness of the water kept her in daze.
Only when the bowl had almost slipped from her hands did she snap out of her trance.
Tsubaki let out a sigh. She quickly washed the bowl and wiped it dry before left the kitchen.
As she walked past the living room, her eyes went to the wall clock. It was close to 10 PM. Her heart was conflicted as she stared at the close door of the study at the second floor.
It had been four days since the morning Ren told her the news regarding her past. Their time in the old house was too occupied with their wedding preparations until Tsubaki just wanted to sleep when the night came and when they returned home, Ren was busy with the company so Tsubaki had no choice but to keep it on hold.
Until she felt like she couldn't endure it anymore.
Tsubaki took quiet steps, heading toward the study. She opened the door slowly, only revealing a narrow slit. Her eyes peered inside the study.
Ren was sitting at the working table. He was focusing on his laptop while occasionally he would look at the documents in front of him. His tensed brows and pursed lips signified that he wasn't in the best of mood.
Tsubaki sighed again. When would he continue?
While she was hanging her head low in front of the door like a dejected cat, she didn't realize that the man inside had noticed her.
Ren's eyes softened once he saw her side profile from the narrow gap of the door. His lips held a faint smile. Seeing her like this made him want to blame himself. He understood what she was reluctant to speak about.
Ren closed his laptop and slowly strode toward the door. He pulled the door, shocking Tsubaki when the door suddenly opened wide from the inside. Her chin jerked up and her eyes widened.
"Dar... Darling..."
Ren let out a soft chuckle. He bent down and brushed his lips on her warm forehead. His voice sounded so low and deep beside her ears.
"Why are you sneaking around like this? Are you sleepy, sweetheart? I'll accompany you to bed first," Ren didn't immediately point out what he had clearly seen written on her face. He held his teasing smile from being too obvious.
"En, no... I'm not sleepy yet," Tsubaki pursed her lips. She silently looked at her husband for a few seconds, he looked calm. With a small voice, she continued, "I just... when would you tell me, darling? I've been waiting. I know that you're busy but..."
Once again Tsubaki lowered her head. She averted her eyes to the soft bunny slippers on her feet.
Ren heaved a sigh. He gently pulled her in his embrace. He ran his left hand on her small head, his bandaged right hand wrapped around her waist. The faint sound of her heart beating resounded clearly in his ears.
"Forgive me for neglecting you, sweetheart," He lightly kissed her temple, his deep voice was imbued with regret. "You must be thinking a lot in these past few days."
"I'm sorry. I know that you're busy but..."
"It's alright," Ren softly cut her off. "There's nothing to be sorry about. Let's go to bed? I'll tell you there."
"But, aren't you busy?" As much as she wanted to know, she felt guilty for disturbing his work. His shoulders bore another level of responsibility, that was why she was so reluctant to intrude on his time.
"My work can wait," Ren chuckled lowly. "Don't think of it. Come, let's go to our bedroom, sweetheart."
Seeing his smile full of tenderness, Tsubaki nodded with a smile of her own. The husband and wife walked to their bedroom. Ren let his wife laid comfortably on the soft mattress before he took his place by her side.
Both of them laid in silence. Tsubaki let Ren played with her long locks. She knew he was trying to arrange which words he wanted to use in order for her to not feel too shock. Her gaze fell on his bandaged right hand. She had seen his wound when she helped him change its dressing. It was a long wound, crossing his palm. As the wound had slowly healed, soft pink flesh could be seen forming new skin.
It looked so painful.
Tsubaki gently held his injured hand, letting him feel her touch.
"Do you remember what I've told you the other day?" Ren retracted his hand from her hair, letting her long hair fell through the gaps of his fingers. He gently placed his palm on her cheek. "About Nakamura Sumire?"
Tsubaki nodded. A trace of disbelief flashed in her eyes as she voiced out what had she been thinking, "You said Nakamura Sumire might not exist. Do you really think she falsified her name as we thought? Then, how did Fujioka Masami could be traced back? Or... were they the same person? But, their handwriting..."
Ren looked deeply at his wife's anxious face. Her assumptions were already close to his. He couldn't guess how many times she had wallowed in her own thoughts as he had busied himself with the company matters in these few days.
He was truly guilty for allowing her to feel that way.
"From Akashi's recent findings, the youngest Miss of the Fujioka Family was rumored to be in love with a commoner. The man worked at another household who had close ties with the Fujiokas. And... it was said that the man was drafted to the army the year when the Fujioka Family went bankrupt. The time coincided with the year you're born."
"What?" Her pupils dilated as she was surprised by such news. Cold sweat started forming on her forehead. "You mean..."
Ren nodded, his expression turned bitter as hesitancy palpable on his face. "Yes. By this time I believed that Fujioka Masami is your birth mother."
Tsubaki quickly sat up, she almost felt dizzy with the blood rushing out of her head. Her world spun when she felt a pair of strong arms supporting her. She laid weakly against him as Ren brought her head to lay on his shoulder.
"Sweetheart..."
"What do you mean?" Tsubaki weakly threw out her question. She took a deep breath before she looked up to meet his dark gaze. "How could it be?"
Ren had expected her to show such a strong reaction once he revealed what he had thought regarding this matter but the pain in his heart made him wanted to retract back his words. Without replying to her, he silently held her close.
Tsubaki encircled her husband's waist as she leaned on him. She didn't speak nor cry. She just wanted to feel the safety in his arms.
As time continued ticking, her mind turned clear. When she spoke again, the tinge of surprise and sadness had already disappeared.
"Darling, if Fujioka Masami was my mother, how about Nakamura Sumire? After all, she was the one who sent the postcards and letters to Mom. What do you think... of them?"
Ren smiled in relief as she looked at him with her clear eyes. The unpleasant feeling that had taken place in his heart from the time he came to the conclusion was replaced with peacefulness. He felt like the shackles restraining his heart had come to unloose.
"So far, I guess that the real Fujioka Masami used Nakamura Sumire as her new identity after she went into hiding and someone else assumed hers. That's the reason why we couldn't find a Nakamura Sumire all this while."
Tsubaki closed her eyes. Well, that was what came to her mind after she was reminded of the different handwriting. What Akashi had found so far pointed the truth toward that direction.
If Fujioka Masami was her birth mother, who was the one who used her name afterward?
Was it a friend or a foe?
"Akashi is looking for the people who worked for the family. I hope we could find at least one who could tell us the truth." Ren looked down and saw her eyes had already closed. A soft smile spread on his face. He lowered down his voice as he added, "Everything would be fine, sweetheart. I promise."
Tsubaki nodded quietly. In the security of his arms, she let her tense nerves relaxed and slowly fallen asleep. The last thing that she remembered before she lost her consciousness was the feeling of his soft lips brushing her forehead.
As the beauty slept within his embrace, his eyes darkened when another thought popped in his mind. In her shock, Tsubaki didn't remember to ask about the household where her birth father worked.
If she asked, how should he answer her?
And...
Should he let the daughter of President Esumi gave her clues to his wife? At this time, he had almost certain who had disguised herself as Fujioka Masami while looking for his wife's sister.
What should he do?
The morning came and once again Tsubaki suffered through morning sickness. She woke up as early as 5, waking her husband up with her. She retched until her throat sore badly.
Her back ached so much and her lungs felt burned as the sensation to vomit pressed on her chest. By the time she was done, her legs trembled and she was almost fell on the floor. If her husband wasn't by her side, she would probably laying on the bathroom floor as her strength diminished.
Ren gently wiped her face as he let her clung on him like a koala. Her face was so pale, devoid of any color. His brows furrowed.
"Sweetheart, you look far worse today," Ren couldn't help but express his worry. He scooped her up and brought her to their bed.
"Darling, it hurts..."
Tsubaki felt like crying today. She didn't know why her sickness suddenly got worsened. Her entire body ached and she didn't even have the energy to even raise her fingers. She coughed a few times, trying to ease her sore throat. Even drinking water didn't help her.
"Hush, I'm here," Ren carefully massaged her back. His action was far gentler than usual as he looked at her weak body. "Sleep first, sweetheart. I'll make you some porridge."
"I don't want it..." Tsubaki closed her eyes, she curled her body like a baby in a womb. Her tone sounded so aggrieved as if she was being wronged by her husband. "I just want to sleep... I don't want to eat..."
She had threw up almost all of the content in her stomach yet she still have the urge to vomit. The mention of food brought discomfort to her stomach and throat even though it was her favorite food.
"No, sweetheart. You still have to eat," Ren persuaded her gently. He didn't want to force her but she would grow weaker if she didn't eat.
Grandma was right. One needed the absolute patience to deal with a pregnant woman.
Ren coaxed his wife to sleep before he tucked her under the quilt. His emotion was complex as he stepped out of their room. Crossing his arms, he started to think what should he prepare for her breakfast.
"This wouldn't do, I have to call Toshiro."
After saying that, he immediately called a certain someone's number. A few seconds passed before a hoarse voice greeted him back.
"What are you doing? Calling me so early in the morning!"
"My wife vomited badly today. I want to bring her to the hospital. I'll see you there in one hour." Ren went straight to the point. Without waiting for his friend's answer, he hung up and returned to the bedroom.
Toshiro cursed under his breath. What use of your wife's personal doctor if you still wanted to harrass me so early in the morning?
With a dejected face, he got off his bed and started dressing for work.