The light became more and more dazzling, and after that, my eyesight became dark again, but I could hear what was around me, pretty much. I heard voices, but I couldn't understand what they were saying. I felt someone taking me in their hands. Was I saved in the last minute ?
The fact that someone was taking me in his hands didn't shock me that much, but the fact that his body was much larger than mine terrified me. "What the f*ck? Am I being taken by a monster or something?" I shouted in my mind. I tried to speak but I could only cry and shout. I had trouble to move my body. In a state of shock, I started to lose my consciousness...
From now on, everything is fuzzy. I think I wake up for a few minutes a day before losing consciousness and regain it again, and so on. Time seems to pass very quickly, and the more time passes, the more I'm aware about my surrounding. I heard more and more voices and I'm able to identify them individually. I can't understand what they're saying, I'm fluent on a few languages such as english, spanish, and french. I can also recognize a few language from Africa, but I've never heard the language the people around me are using.
Now, I can see everything in front of me in a radius of 60 centimeters. I can see, but the only colors that I can perceive are red, blue and green. Before that, I could barely see, and only in black and white, like on those ancient T.V. I can also perceive and feel more clearly my limbs, and it was at this point that I understood what was going on. I have two explanations for what was happening.
The most simplest explanation was that I was reincarnated in a new body, and from the language they spoke, maybe another world.
The second explanation was that I became crazy, I was saved at the last minute and that everything here is a product of my imagination. Maybe I'm dreaming, like those guys who are able to dream in a deep coma. But the pain, and everything I'm feeling around seems to prove the opposite. I'm sure at 90% percent that I'm not dreaming, but the fact that I'm in a new body, maybe in a new world, seems less likely than me dreaming or freaking out in a hospital.
I thought deeply about it, and I came to the conclusion that I was reincarnated in a new world. The reasons for why am I thinking about that is simple. First my surrounding. It seems I'm living in a little house. there is no glass window, but just wooden shutters. Much of what surrounds me is made of wood, not properly made though. The walls are made of brick, and I sleep in a small bed, which looks like an infant bed, but with shorter bars.
The outlines of the furniture in my room are rough and it is honestly a bit cold here. If I wasn't covered with several bed sheets, I would soon be dead from cold. I can tell that I'm not living in a luxurious place, but also not on a desolate one, a common place seems to be the good words to describe the current place I'm living in I think.
There is no way to warm up by any futuristic means such as a heater too. I could have just blamed that by the fact that I live in a remote territory of without any futuristic means, but it's the second fact that made me understand that I was reincarnated, my body.
I'm clearly in the body of a baby, but more importantly, it's the growth I made that made me understood that I'm not dreaming. First, I could see barely what is in front of me in a radius of 20 centimeters, and only in black and white. I couldn't differentiate clearly what is in front of me, but after some time, I was able to see some object roughly of 20 millimeters that are 60 centimeters ahead of me.
I was only able to see in white and black, and my vision was bad for an unknown reason, but then, I was able to see what was in red, green, blue and yellows, which corresponds to the evolution of the sight of a baby. My listening was perfect since the beginning too, the hearing a baby has is the sharpest sense he have when he is born. There is also the fact that I'm collapsing a lot.
A baby sleep a lot on a day, but that does not justify the fact that I remember so little of what happens every day. My brain is probably unable to remember and process everything I'm sensing in a day, adding the fact that each times that I'm waking up, I'm thinking of a lot of things a baby would be incapable to think of too.
The human memory is not linear, it jump across time and with the brain of a baby, it's probably on a much larger scales than an adult, that's why I'm feeling that time flies so fast.
It's already a miracle that I'm able to think that much with a brain of a baby, in my current state, my thought are probably slower than when I was an adult too I suppose...
If I was in a dream, my mind wouldn't be able to put me in this situation, since I can't remember in what state I was when I was a baby, and even if I know the state a baby should be, what would have been logical then, would be thinking of myself of being a baby, while retaining all my current senses as an adult since dreaming is perceiving without being restrained by the senses, but here I am restrained by my own senses.
Well, let's stop thinking if what I'm seeing is real or not, since it's technically impossible to prove at 100% that everything around me is real, let's just assume the most convenient choice, me in an another world. With all of those information, I could deduce that I am actually a baby around five months.
Having realized that I was reincarnated, I only felt one emotion, despair. I can't clearly see everything around me nor of my global state, but I can clearly remember my past, the only thing that followed me in this life, and the only thing I wished to disappear is still here. I'm in a new world, with a new setting, but still with the same things that haunt me.
Think about it, if you're reincarnated in a new world and in a new body, how would you feel ? The fact that everything in your life, every person you've encountered, every happy and sad moment you lived, and every actions you made became meaningless is more terrifying than it seems.
It's not the fact that everything became meaningless, it's the fact that I'm aware of that.
Unless you saw in that a new chance to start a new and exciting life, no one should be perfectly happy in that situation. Only the most delusional, naive and the most hopeless ones would truly wish of a new beginning, detached to their world.
What if everything in my life is gonna be the same, like in my old life ? Sins can't be washed on a man, you either let them kill you, or you grow bigger to support them. Obviously, I seemed to be in the first case, but I revived with a new setting, but my sins are still weighing me, and now they are supposedly irrelevant since I started a new life? Bullshit.
Peoples can't forget their regret that easily... The environment is different indeed, but my personality doesn't seems to have changed. Humans have the capacity to adapt on a new environment... but my case is strange enough for that rule to not apply correctly.
No matter what you did or how you lived in your life, you will feel regret and pain at some point if you reincarnated in an another world since you've lost your "home" forever. And for your parents and your friends?
How would you feel about them?
Well, that question does not completely concern me, but I find it difficult to accept my new "parents" and simply forget my precedents. No matter how horrible they were, they loved me, but in their own way. I feel like I'm betraying them by accepting my new "parents", and betraying what is dear to me is one of the things I can't do, it's one of my absolute rules.
Never betray those who are dear to you, and never be betrayed by those you trust. Trust is what really defines a family, a friend and a foe, that's the importance they place on it.
I can't clearly understand what my "parents" are saying when they are talking even now. I can identify the word "mom" and "dad". I can also identify their faces, but not completely their bodies.
My father is around 1.80 meters, he has red hair and a robust body but not enough muscular to identify him as intimidating. My mother is around 1.60 meters, with black hair and a cute face without wrinkles in contrary to my father, who has slight wrinkles on his forehead and near his eyes.
Her faces also shine with kindness. They are white skinned, and look like Europeans. I also could identify their names, my father's name is Freyley Guaris, and my mother's name is Freyley Celia. And finally, what seems to be my name is Freyley Varos...
I'll try to identify more clearly where am I, and if I'm truly in another world or not...
If I am truly in another world, maybe this time I will be able to change and free myself from my previous fate...