It was in the evening when light flakes of snow danced in the brisk wind that swept over the streams of the Ishikari River. They seemed too fragile even for winter snow but were rather more reminiscent of a swarm of summer insects. When the sky remained overcast, they disappeared against the clouds. Only when the sun shone through did one become aware of the powdery, swirling snow. The cold in the air was worse than it would have been on a day of heavy snow.
As she stood over the snow-covered gravel path, she stared at Shishio in a complicated mood since she had never expected to see him here. The determination she had built before suddenly started to crumble when she saw him.
When she didn't see him, she could stay calm and numbed everything with alcohol, but when he appeared, the more she longed by his side. The days that she spent with him weren't something she couldn't forget, and she hadn't seen him after she left, but when she knew that she couldn't be with him, so this was enough.
Yes, this was enough.
She only wanted to see him for the last time before she completely disappeared from his life.
Watching him appear in front of her, she knew that he had come to make her return, but she made up her mind to reject him. Still, the reality was different from the reality.
"Ah, sorry, I seem to recognize a different person."
Shishio bowed his head and excused himself.
"....." Chihiro.
"I was joking." Shishio turned at Chihiro again, observing her up and down. "But, really, you're in a mess." Usually, she was beautiful, but now, while she was still attractive, her condition was terrible.
Chihiro's lips twitched, and she said, "Aren't you the same?" Similar to her, he was also in a mess, especially when she could see bandages and his clothes seemed hadn't been changed for several days. However, this was her first time seeing him like this, and she couldn't help but feel worried.
"Isn't it your fault?" Shishio looked at Chihiro with some resentment.
"...my fault?" Chihiro was dumbfounded.
"Because of you, I was beaten by my father."
"...ugh."
"Then, I was forced to go to Asahikawa by hitchhiking."
"...hitchhiking?"
"Yes." Shishio sighed and thought of the novelty experience of going to the Asahikawa by hitchhiking. It was tough since he faced many unique things along the way, but at the same time, it also confirmed his feelings.
As he watched the woman, who had caused him trouble, he could see the peak of Mt. Arashiyama, which was dazzling white.
"...sorry."
This was the only thing that she could say. She knew that she had caused him many troubles, especially when she disappeared so suddenly, and also reported their relationship to his parents. She knew that she had given him so much trouble, and she didn't know how to apologize.
"Take responsibility."
"What?"
"You have to take responsibility and go back with me."
"....."
Chihiro lowered her head, struggling before she shook her head. "...no." Her voice was quiet, but it was clear.
"What?"
"No!"
"Didn't you promise me that day?"
"I know..."
"Then, why?" Shishio asked with a frown.
"Because I will bring you nothing but trouble!" Chihiro sobbed as she stared at him with a tearful expression.
"...did you remember that time?"
"That time?"
"When we were in Okinawa... at that time when we were together in our room... we had our fun, but... but when you told me that someone might capture us..."
"But that didn't happen, right?"
"Yes, that didn't happen, but what if it happened?" She stared at him and asked, "What do you think will happen to us? How will the world see us? I thought I was ready for this, but when I thought that I would just become your burden... I...
"That's why... please give up on me."
Her expression was firm as she said, "Being with me won't make you happy! You will lose your future because of me! Everything... your hard work... reputation... whatever you have achieved in life, you will lose all of them because of me..."
Yes, she would bring him nothing but trouble for him.
Being with her would destroy him.
She didn't want to be the reason why he lost everything. She decided to leave because she loved him. She only wanted the best for him, and his best was without her.
"Please leave..."
She closed her eyes as she begged him. "...please leave me, okay?" Those precious memories with him, she didn't want to stain them. She wanted to let them remain beautiful, and she would definitely treasure all of those days with him.
That's why... that's why... it was better for him to leave since those memories might turn into an ugly nightmare.
"Stupid."
However, what she received was nothing but a childish scolding.
"...ha?"
She opened her eyes and stared at him dumbfoundedly.
"I mean, you're stupid."
"..." Chihiro.
"Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!"
"Who is stupid?!" She got angry and scolded him in return. "What are you? An elementary school student?"
"You're a stupid, moronic idiot middle age woman."
"MY AGE HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS! ALSO, I AM NOT OLD! I AM STILL IN MY 29 YEARS AND A FEW MONTHS!" Chihiro roared in anger before she huffed while looking away.
"....."
Shishio was speechless by her age, but he decided to ignore it.
"Go back with me."
She was stunned, and her eyes widened when she heard his words. Her heart trembled, and she knew that these should be the words that she wanted to hear the most from him, but she looked away and didn't dare to look at him, afraid that he might see her real feeling.
"No."
"Go back with me."
"No!"
Her voice was stronger and clearer, showing her rejection of going back with him.
"The future without you isn't something that I want."
Her heart wavered as she stared at him, who told her his feelings.
"The future you always to be on my side is something that I want."
After he said those words, he approached her closer.
"Always by your side? What do you mean? Sounds like a proposal."
She tried to hold back her tears, yet she couldn't.
She tried to mask her trembling voice, yet she couldn't.
She tried to get away from him, yet she couldn't.
"Proposal? That's not bad. I will marry you." He smiled and thought that the idea wasn't bad.
"Stupid! Do you think that a nephew and an aunt can marry each other?" She scolded him mercilessly with a blush.
"Probably not." He shook his head.
"Then...?" She sounded so disappointed.
"But, I am different. Whether it is my future or you, I will get all of them, so don't think of leaving me again."
He hugged her tightly in his arms, afraid that she would leave again while telling her to leave everything to him.
"...you're so greedy."
She didn't push him, leaving her arms dangling, hesitating on either side.
"I am." He smiled. "Did you just realize that now?"
Like the sun came out after the rain, this was how she saw his smile.
Yet, was it really okay?
Was it okay for them to be together?
She wanted to be with him more than anyone, yet was it really okay?
Was it okay for her to embrace this happiness?
"Then... what if... what if you can't get your future because of me? Will you hate me because of that?"
She didn't dare to ask this question before, but in the end, she couldn't hold it since she wanted to know no matter how cruel it was.
"Enough! I don't care about the future! I only want you! How about you? Do you want to be with me?"
Those words seemed to break something which she blocked inside.
'But...'
"Chihiro!" He roared. "Answer me!"
She couldn't control her emotions anymore, and all her resistance was broken as she exposed her feelings.
"I want to! I want to be with you! I want to be with you forever! But, I am afraid! I am afraid that I will hurt you!"
She burst into sobs as she hugged him tightly without letting him go.
"That's enough. Whatever the future will be, we will face it together. Let's hold each other. Whether it is happiness or sadness, we will be together," he caressed her head gently as he wiped the tears from her eyes.
"Um."
"Don't run away again."
"Um."
"Don't selfishly think the best for me."
"Um."
"Be my woman obediently."
"Um..."
"Also, trust me, okay? It hurts me when you don't trust me like before."
"Um." She nodded as she hugged him even tighter.
"Lastly, this might seem like nonsense to you, but let's get married in the future."
She blushed as she faced his clear crystal-like eyes before she nodded shyly. "Um."
Words resounded in their hearts like a countdown to their future.
Even now, they weren't sure what their future would hold, but as long as they were together, that was enough since as long as they were together, everything would be alright.
Shoulders each other's burdens and always by each other's side.
Between the snow-covered park and beneath the setting sun to the west, they kissed each other as they exchanged vows to be together for eternity.
As they hugged each other, Chihiro felt at ease. She snuggled at his chest as if it was the most comfortable place in the world. As she looked up, she saw the snowflakes fall like the sparkle of the stars. It was so breathtaking and poignant.
"It's snow..."
"Hmm?"
"It's okay."
She held him tightly.