Akaba's POV
I didn't remember who said it the first time, or maybe that it was I myself that come up with the phrase.
But damn everything tastes better after a job well done. Even burned meat stabbed on a stick, or maybe that was just what remained of my 'old sense of taste' talking.
Well no matter how terrible the food is it will always taste better with the seasoning of hunger, tiredness, and of course the fact that we got our lunch for free.
"Thanks again for treating us for lunch Gouji-san!" Koen thanked our saviour. Happily chewing on his meat stick as if it was actually any good.
"No-no. We should be the one thanking you. You really saved us a lot of money after all...."
To understand what's going on a slight rewind is required.
Koen and I had just finished securing our group a clean getaway- I mean a means of transportation to the daemon's capital the Enfer empire when we spotted two other adventurers in the process of getting swindled.
One short argument and cliche escape attempt later we (or more specifically the adventurers who almost got ripped off) managed to apprehend the sharpie with ease. And it was only then that we learned of our fortuitous fortune.
"But Rai-san was really fast! As expected of a B ranked adventurer."
"Please just call me Rai Koen-san, I'm younger than you after all."
"Don't be so modest! That fraudster was really fast for a small time crook! But Rai-san was even faster! It was like whoosh! and all the sudden you were already there!"
Acting like a child. Classic Koen.
Truth is, none of it was accidental. If it was any other people then we would've just let them be and have them learn a valuable lesson about not trusting a guy who popped out of an alley and just magically happen to provide exactly what they needed at a self-proclaimed curtailed price.
Okay, you know what? Maybe we also lend them a hand out of pity but the point is we jumped right in exactly because of who they are.
A couple of influential people who are too gullible for their own good. But since it inadvertently worked in our favour who are we to protest?
The greatest Archer of the six nations, Gouji. And the so-called Hero of this world, Rai. These two are members of the B-ranked adventurer party Casus.
Why would we associate with famous people like them you ask? Especially with our fly under the radar thing going on?
That's the twist, we're befriending them because they're famous.
Unlike in movies or any other entertainment depiction befriending a prominent figure doesn't lead to permanent ground on the limelight. Sure it'll garner attention for a while at the start but after a while you'd be lucky to even have a single person bat an eye.
Besides these two now knows us not as skilled adventurers, but as two normal errand runners who are skilled in the fields outside of their own. So the furthest we could ever get is probably having our name mentioned for a 'not so hazardous guaranteed paper involved'.
In an unrelated note, pretty sure I'd be the only living man who has ever thought of this, but damn I miss paperwork.
"Ano..."
"What is it?"
"No. it's just that looks like your mind is elsewhere."
He got that part right. I took a bite out of my meal, to throw him off course, not because it's any
"I'm just amazed that's all. I can't really believe that two of the strongest adventurer almost fall for an obvious ruse."
"Haha... well...."
Remember that expression we used a few paragraphs ago? That wasn't an expression. These two bozos really had almost given their money to some hoaxer who is the literal embodiment of a street urchin. And did I mention that he came from an alley?
"About that... I was always told that I'm far too trusting of others....."
That doesn't even begin to cover it, was what I almost said. Unfortunately, Koen was too busy dealing with the hero prodigy so I was forced to tone down my bluntness.
"Naivety isn't exactly bad you know. That might just be the thing that'll save your life one day."
"You really think so?"
Speaking from experience? Not really.
"Sure. Life works in mysterious ways and all that."
"....Red-san. You're not really good at sugar coating, aren't you?"
"Based on your reaction? Obviously not."
My dry humour earned me a chuckle. And Midori said that sarcasm will only bring frowns.
"Gouji-san! We have to go!" The so-called hero declared. Now that I got a good look at him, he really does look the part.
Shounen protagonist is the word that comes to mind. Complete with the typical hairstyle and the humble background (Koen's handiwork). Also, the kid is fucking 16 for god's sake, and his story is already shaping up like a typical anime (except for the part of him being dense (thank whatever god is running this place)).
That would make Gouji the bookish older sidekick, wouldn't it? Because his looks definitely fit the bill. And after getting a better look (I usually didn't pay that much on other's facial detail) he's a tad like Midori minus the eternal scowl. Simply put he looks like a 'Wiseman'.
"Ah! That's right! Pallas and Lumiere! We promised to meet up for lunch!"
"If we go now we might just make it!.... Probably!"
"Sorry, Red-san! Yellow-san! But we have to go! Again thank you very much for saving us!"
Judging from the nature of your dialogue you're not out of harm's way yet, but that's none of my business. With a parting wave, they left our field of vision at a moderate pace, probably vanishing to those with untrained eyes.
"That went well." Koen chirped.
"Yep. We should get going too."
"Aha! You're afraid if we arrive last you'd be made fun of! Aren't you senpai!?"
"Of course not..... And even if I did, It'd be the both of us you know?"
"Sure-sure~. Mostly you though."
A tick mark appeared on my head. A chase sequence happened.
"Get back here you little!..."
"Ahaha! This is what you get for bragging too much!"
In the end, we were the ones who got back first.
XxX
"Senpai.... Isn't it enough?...." Koen weakly asked.
"Hm? Well, I guess it has been long enough..." he perked up. "But another five minutes won't hurt anyone now, wouldn't it?"
"Eh~? But I already learned my lesson! Also, aren't you embarrassed being seen like this?"
He was referring to the fact that I got him in a headlock.
"Of course not. After all, I'm teaching my irreplaceable kouhai an important lesson about respecting his upperclassmen! Certainly, that outweighs a stare or two from people who I don't even know or care!"
"No... You're definitely taking this personally. Also, your hold is tightening..."
"Now what are you talking about~?"
"Guh! Can't.... breathe....."
Should I be worried about choking him to death? He always brags about how he can hold his breath, so I say this is more of me double checking his statement. It wasn't long until Momoiro and Aogiri arrived.
"Ara. Did you two had another fight?"
"Took a bit longer than usual. Surprising."
Seeing those two made me loosen my hold for just a teeny bit. That was enough for him to slip away and get his respiratory on track.
"Uwah Momoiro-san! Akaba was being super mean!"
With (fake) tears he sprinted towards the sole female of our group. Arms spread it looks like he wanted to envelop her in a hug.
Despite managing to get out of the frying pan he stupidly jumped straight into the fire.
Not even coming close to the woman a hand promptly snatched the runner by the face. Followed with the perpetrator effortlessly lifting him with said single appendage.
"You sure are friendly with a man's wife huh?"
It was Aogiri. Well, it was nice knowing you Koen, hopefully, your replacement won't be as noisy as you are.
"I'm.... really sorry?"
"So those are your last word? Very well then...."
"No-no wait! It's not like that! I just want to hug her and have her spoil me a little!"
"..."
"....."
Yep. He really is a genius at getting people pissed. Aogiri's grip tightens, this really is the end of the line for him.
"Stop it Ao." Momoiro interrupted. Effectively sparing Koen's from her husband's wrath.
"Killing him now will be counterproductive. He is very useful to us after all."
Okay, that sounded menacing. Either logic is the only way to get Aogiri to stop or she's holding a grudge of her own. By the way, the husband's iron claw remained pristine. It looks like he's not letting go unless the wife especially instructs him to.
"Furthermore~. Why did you call me one-san, Koen? Last time I check both Aogiri and me is a year younger than you...."
He really is dead meat. And on an unrelated note, that's her trigger? That explained why I never called her anesan out loud despite that being a fitting nickname. Always stopped at the last second because of an 'unexplainable' chill that would run up my spine.
Back to the present, unless Midori pulls a perfectly timed arrival I really should prepare for a funeral.
"I'm surprised. Who would've thought that you could gather this much attention without getting Akaba involved?"
I forgot the part where he's a total smartass obviously.
"Ara-ara. Looks like I've let my emotion got the better of me."
No verbal retort came from Aogiri, though him finally letting Koen go left little to be said.
"Uhu~ This really is the worst day ever...."
"Not for me. It's been pretty great. Especially the last few minutes."
"Mou... You're so mean senpai!" I ignored him flailing his arms like a five-year-old and turned to Midori.
"What took you so long? And why does it look like you haven't eaten anything?"
"Found a good book." Was all he said, obviously it costed more than the budget he demanded from me.
"Also I found a way back. Now can you give some money to buy some food."
Is this a chance of making fun of a guy like him for being broke I hear. In that case.
"Only if you ask very nice.....wait what did you say?"
"What are you deaf now? I said I need some money to get food. Also, I found a way back to our world, the modern one."
What happens next? You guessed it! A cliche silence that was broken by a totally comical, out of place and inappropriate, gurgling stomach sound effect. And since I didn't ridicule Midori for making that noise, you know how serious things are.
Five minutes later and our office mage is now munching on a skewered meat.
"Disgusting, but cheap."
"Can we please get back on the whole 'I found a way back' thing? How the heck did you figure it all out anyway!" I half shouted.
"You should thank the rulers of every nation for that. Clearly circulating a national level intel is a thing here."
"It says here that this 'ceremony' requires a gargantuan amount of energy, to begin with. Impossible without an equally grand coalition I assume?" Momoiro asked, already nose deep on our 'ticket back home'.
"Leylines monopoly and inter-kingdom agreement." Aogiri further summarized.
I've already skimmed through it but is more interested in my Midori's claim.
Now that I think about it, that actually explains a lot. This whole hero summoning is the parallel of nuclear warheads here. The leylines are also located nearby the headquarters/royal adobe of each country. Not to mention, the processes to use it also warrants allocation of large resources from all six.
The puzzle fits. This system denies centred usage by one superpower only, and by wide spreading the requirement, one that is virtually impossible for a single entity to possess, they're flaunting advantage and uses it as a method of determent.
"But that doesn't matter, right? We can go back, right?" I know that my exposition was purely educational, but can't you at least show more interest, Koen?
"Shouldn't be a problem. There's a smaller leyline a few kilometres from the city. Combine that with some of my own juice and we're good to go."
There was no use in second questioning Midori's claim, and that means we're really going home.
"So... That's it? We're going back?" Again the enthusiast pry arises from my partner, and for once I actually felt bad for what I'll say next.
"No. Finding a way back is only half of our problem. The other half is about who sent us here...."
As expected my reminder was met by an ominous silence. This is HIM we are talking about, after all.
The genius Shiro Shacho. Even after throwing us into another world we still refer to him as such, that just shows what kind of a man he is and what kind of 'lasting impression' he can leave to a person. Or any living being really.
"Something as big as this couldn't possibly escape him. And that can only mean...."
"Waiting. Already prepared."
I nodded at Aogiri's curt conclusion. "He's expecting us to... no. He knows we'll get back, so it's obvious that he'd be prepared for us. So the only thing left to do is to decide...."
"....Fight or talk." It didn't matter who got to that conclusion first. That is indeed the only correct answer.
Shiro Shacho sent us here, doubtlessly for his own personal agenda. That also means he out of anyone here knows that we can get back with little effort all that's left is to find out why.
Which led to the question. Should we ask him? Or beat it out of him? Both choice leading to us meeting face to face.
The continued tranquillity proves how much of a big decision this is. The 'one wrong move and we'll end up dead' kind.
Midori was out of his depth in this one. He might be our brains, but something as ambiguous as this coin toss left much desired for intellectual involvement.
Bargaining will certainly within the couple's range, but with someone like Shachou? We'd have better luck separating those two from one another.
No. This calls for negotiation. This calls for both of us.
"What should we do? Koen?" I seriously asked. My voice decreasing by one baritone.
He easily noticed my 'change', he's my partner after all. I'm pulling all the stops here is what I'm basically saying.
Taking a deep breath and closing his eyes, once his orbs became visible again there was a new freshness that accompanies them. Koen to, is now in high gear.
"In my opinion talking is better."
"I thought so to." Then I turned to the others. "Basically whether we fight or talk, he will definitely be prepared. So it's a high probability that no matter what we'd end up losing. This is him we're talking about after all."
He's the kind of guy who will smile earnestly while pointing a gun at you. And I can easily imagine him doing just that to celebrate our homecoming.
"Ara~. I wonder will he be holding us on gunpoint when greeting us back."
"Maybe a sword. Much more aesthetic."
"Bastard probably rigged the whole place with explosives, waving the detonator like it's a magic wand."
Seemingly off track but plausible, even an orbital canon wouldn't be too far of. Also, the humour is a pleasant touch. Looks like fear of Murphy's law wasn't the only thing our director drilled into our heads, ironic humour is also here all the way.
Hopefully, things will stay like this until we get back.
"Alright then. Let's just get back before anything else...."
(AN EXTREMELY LOUD ROAR)
God. Fucking. Damnit.
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
".....Don't say it...."
"No-no. This is clearly the universe being a dick." Nice one Koen, you're a real reliable partner.
"....Just... what are we dealing with?"
The fleeing crowd was a dead giveaway that it was something big. Meaning that it's either an invasion or a really big animal."
"Dragon! Dragon!" One of the people shrieked. That sounds about right, talk about real cliche though.
"Probably a wyvern. Their domain is much closer, idiots probably mistook it for a dragon." Not even a great peril can stop Midori from being insufferable. But I for one have problems of my own.
"We could just ignore it and be on our way back to earth....."
"I'm waiting for an or here, senpai!"
"(sigh)... Or we can check on that shop Aogiri and Momoiro surveyed. The one with acceptable price tag."
"Owner is nice. Weapons are good."
"And I'm sure he'd be happy to lend us a few things for free~. We'll just return everything to him once we're done~"
Those two sound super on board with this. All that's left is....
"Even if it doesn't I'm sure he'd like to have his equipment endorsed by people who slew a wyvern."
"Hence the orb of lightning?" I pointed out, a crackling bluish energy dancing on Midori's palm.
"Extra precaution."
Again I sighed. Truthfully it's not as bad as it sounds. We will never come back here after this anyway, so there is no need to worry about unwanted attention. Also, everyone here obviously wants to do this from the heck of it, not human decency. Whatever I can use the workout.
"Right. Let's get this over with. Time for some real live Mo*ster Hunt*r."