Chapter 58 - Cliche (2)

Support my contracted main novel and winner of Writing Prompts #26 - The Legendary Mage!

Desolate Mage: A Legend Reborn!

https://www.webnovel.com/book/12013957905760805/Desolate-Mage%3A-A-Legend-Reborn!

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Slowly changing from using brackets "( )" for inner thoughts, to using single inverted commas ' ' for inner thoughts.

'Like this...' instead of (Like this...).

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Every parent has great hopes for their child.

They hope their children grow to be greater men or women than they; for no parent raises their child to suffer ignobly; nor to be a failure.

On the other hand; arguably one of the wisest man to ever live wrote this:

So I hated life, because the work that is done under the sun was grievous to me. All of it is meaningless, a chasing after the wind.

I hated all the things I had toiled for under the sun, because I must leave them to the one who comes after me.

And who knows whether that person will be wise or foolish? Yet they will have control over all the fruit of my toil into which I have poured my effort and skill under the sun. This too is meaningless

I believe that, when they are preparing the inheritance laid aside for their heirs; it is in no parent's heart to consider this question:

What if my child is a fool...?

...Alright, enough with the philosophy; Cheers!

-A guy in a pub

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"Albert...? Albert...?! ALBERT!" The girl shouted at the man; snapping him out of the internal monologue he was having.

"Are you okay...?" She smiled sweetly at him; a perfect expression for a 10 year old girl - at least, one that was not also the source of his sorrows.

"...Yes. I am." He wiped away his tears and composed himself.

The projection had paused; it seemed that they needed to do something to make it continue.

So, patting Sam on the shoulder, he beckoned for her to step forward to the projection - where the altar was. Albert stayed close, about 3 steps behind her.

Drawing nearer the altar, he could see the words written under it - "Wyrm at the End of the Far - artist's impression - artistic license applied."

'It looks nothing like the real thing!! Not at all!!!' He wished he could wrangle the neck of the artist responsible for the abominable statue - one that had scared the daylights out of him despite his multitudinous years of experiences.

'This place... Whoever build this seriously has some screws loose...' He sighed.

When she casually strolled over to draw near to the altar; countless beams of red and blue lights swiveled over, directed at her. Then a beam of horizontal light scanned over her body; before a female-sounding mechanical voice spoke; the sound reverberating from the surroundings.

"Beep! Scanning..."

"Beep! Subject meets all preset criteria! Proceeding to run protocols... Proceeding to schedule corresponding jobs... Proceeding to assign commensurate difficulty - Level 2."

"Beep! Error! Protocols failure! Defaulting to highest difficult - Level 10."

"Have fun, suckers."

"We heard that!!!!!!!" Albert shouted, spluttering; mouth open and exclaiming certain ineffable words.

"That mechanical voice... Is not a machine!! It's just someone pretending to be a machine!!" Albert snapped; yelling and pointing at the ceiling; exasperated with the gob-smacking turn of events so far. He could not stand it anymore; it all felt like some badly written comedy.

"Tch... Beep!"

"You just clicked your tongue!!! And you're not even trying to pretend anymore!!! If you're going to "Beep" in the wrong place; don't even bother trying to beep at all!!!"

Albert huffed and puffed; face turned red. He couldn't understand why he was so irritated; but the whole situation he was in made him blow his top. It was just too... Frivolous.

A contrived "chase" by dragons.

Leading to a mysterious "cave" which just happened to be in a ravine that the dragons "couldn't chase them into".

Inside the "cave" was a obviously death-flag raising altar... Full of bad jokes and a sadistic announcements operator.

Enough was enough!

"Sam, we're leaving." Albert took her hand and turned around to walk out of the bad comedy setup.

Only to be faced by mechanical roller-shutter doors slamming down. Doors covered in runes; saturated so densely with defensive runes that; if he didn't look closely, it looked just like a layer of shiny blue paint on the doors.

"Ahem... Master left instructions: Once a successor candidate is found; they are not to leave until they have finished the tests; or until they are..."

"Dead...?" Albert offered for the voice.

"..." Whoever was doing the announcements was rendered speechless momentarily. Albert then heard sounds of movement, as if though someone were fumbling with the speech device; or had fallen down.

Then the voice returned. "...Dammit; I rehearsed that line for ages!! Beep! Yes! If the candidate does not pass; everyone dies!!!" She sounded very, very discouraged and agitated.

It was Albert's turn to be speechless. (He still insists on the beeping...)

"So, when do we eat the penguin...?"

It was now both Albert's and the announcement person's turn to be speechless, together.

"...I feel for you, middle-aged short-tempered man..." The voice consoled the man who was so incensed that he was on the verge of tears.

"...Beep!"

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"Dear test subject; please be warned that the difficulty has been raised to Level 10. This is not a joke; I repeat, this is not a joke. The difficulty has been raised to Level 10."

"...Would it be ok to ask a few questions...?"

The voice nodded.

"Hello...? Can you hear me...? Are you still there...?"

"...Y-yes, yes, didn't you hear me the first time? You may ask questions."

"First, what should we call you...? And what are the criteria for selecting a successor candidate?"

"Please call me Computer Liandra, or C-Li for short. And the criteria are as follows."

The female sounding voice sometimes forgot to speak mechanically, lapsing into patterns of speech common for a young girl - like Sam. Except that Sam didn't speak like a young girl; she spoke more like a young ogre.

C-Li began her explanation.

"Subject must be below level 3; below 11 years of age and of at least 50% human lineage."

Albert pulled the hairs of his non-existent beard on his chin; thinking before he asked the next question. "And how long have you been waiting here for a successor candidate...?"

"It has been 4.726 periods since we crash landed on these snowy mountains; amongst the dragon-kind. Many have come to attempt candidacy; with some meeting the criteria. However, none who met the criteria have been able to pass the tests. The difficulty is just too high for the level, age and bloodline that master set... Beep."

"That difficult huh... Oh; what do you mean by 4.7 periods...? What is that in human time...? 4 years...?"

"... 4.726 Millenia..."

"Oh, so it's 4.726 Millenia..."

"FOUR POINT SEVEN SIX TWO MILLENIA???"

"No, it's FOUR POINT SEVEN TWO SIX Millenia. Beep." The girl parroted him; including his disconcerted shouting. Blinking in shock; Albert tried to put the thought of the girl's age away from his mind.

He then continued with his question as Sam explored the small cave with Snowie, sniffing around for food.

"And, uhh... What is the difficulty 2, difficulty 10? What kind of test should we expect...?" He was still quite shaken; that was more than 20 times his age so far... Perhaps this was a remnant from the Age of Wonders...?

"Oh!" C-Li exclaimed, as if excited to explain this part; then paused - this time as if recalling that she was supposed to be the Artificial Intelligence assistant of the inheritance testing site.

"...B-beep. Difficulty 2 is extremely easy; meant for level 2 candidates..."

Albert waited. The punchline was too obvious; he expected a turnaround that would make the test extremely difficult. Otherwise; wouldn't the successor have been selected countless millenia ago? He waited expectantly; not to be surprised this time.

"...For level 2 candidates that have already resonated with a concept, law or element of the univer--"

"!!!!!!!"

Before she could complete her sentence; Albert had already gasped and felt his scalp grow numb; the hairs on the back of his neck rising in fear.

The smile on his face slipped; becoming a twisted grimace. He thought he was prepared for the preposterous things the founder of this inheritance site had in store; but now he knew he was completely out of his league.

His only comfort was that Sam had already far exceeded the requirements on this point... This was not even considering her innate instincts for battle - her combat multiplier should be a mid to late 30x multiplier - equivalent to that of a level 12-13 elite. Coupled with her bursts of magnified power and her already mind-boggling strength...

That was how the girl alone had defeated the vampire princess and her three level 20 maids at the World Class realm; forcing the daughter of the Eternal Night to flee under the guise of illusions... A team that could cleanly take down a fully grown level 22 dragon and her level 15 whelp! Bear in mind that a level 22 dragon was easily a match for a Legendary opponent of level 24...

The conclusion...?

Sam was strong. Truly, truly strong. Under the right circumstances and with the right approach, she could even face opponents over 20 levels above her!

However, it wasn't as simple as Sam being able to thrash dragons. It was like rock-paper-scissors. The party of the princess could take down the dragon due to their astounding synergy. Sam could take down the party due to being immune to mind control. The dragon could just stay untouchable up in the sky and blow Sam away with dragon breath.

The only problem he foresaw was either a battle of attrition against endless waves of enemies; or an enemy she could not utilise her monstrous strength against - one with better speed, better agility or sharper battle techniques. And also those which one needed intelligence to identify their weaknesses...

Against all these, neither the Demon's Slaying Fist-- Ahem, the Demon-slaying Fist nor her other art would work. Nonetheless; nothing much could be done at this point; he could only remind her to utilise the trump cards he had imparted to her... And hope they could survive then make it to Rome in one piece.

Regaining his clarity; Albert tuned back in to the girl's voice explaining the difficulty. He clicked his tongue as he realised he had missed the explanation for difficulty 2; but figured it wouldn't matter as they were not facing that difficulty level.

"...So that ends my explanation for the difficulties! Yup! Beep. Teleporting candidate to the testing grounds in 1 second. 1..."

"Waitwaitwaitwaitwaitwait!!!"

"...0, let's go!" She sounded very excited; understandable for a conscience stuck in place for millenia with barely any visitors. "Beep." She nearly forgot to beep again...

Dumbfounded, Albert had no chance to ask for a re-cap or strategise as Sam began to turn to particles of light; smiling at him and tossing Snowie into his embrace.

"Don't worry Albert; I heard everything she said! Bye bye! See you again for dinner time..."

'You heard everything...?!? That's exactly what I'm worried about!!! Whether you heard it or not; it doesn't make any difference!!! Don't give me heart attacks please!!!'

"No, Sam, you--" He desperately called out, trying to stop the process.

"Ah!!!" Sam screamed; realising something was terribly, terribly wrong.

"I haven't even eaten breakfast yet today! How can I fig--"

She was gone; leaving a man and cat on their knees; praying to whichever god would hear them.

Their fates were in the hands of the girl whose head was just another digestive organ.

I.e.

They were doomed.