The quiet, shy, reserved girl?
Believe me, that's not who I am.
I am a little something more than that.
Y/N's P.O.V-
It was silent in the car.
None of us was taking initiatives to eliminate the toxicity of awkwardness and let both breath in freedom. I sat rigidly on my seat, going through a list of enough regrets to nod over him offering a ride to my home. I was ready to deny over his sweet and sour little words 'Let me drop you home, noona' with a big no in a polite way, but the situation had me cornered. So, here I was, getting a lift from a criminal with an idol face, my target.
Sigh.
I glanced around the car. It sure was expensive. The radio was turned on in a low volume almost unhearable, whatever was on the channel could be heard nothing but some gibberish words. I loosened up on the comfortable seat as the car gained acceleration bit by bit. Tilting my head to the left, his sharp jawline faced my sight, his stern face was too focused on the road. I felt much relaxed being deprived of any attention. I slid down the window glass wholly. A huge blow of air rushed in the car, making my hair dance along with the flow and get all messed up. With a deep exhale, I blew out all my tiredness at one breath. A full moon at stand on the unreachable sky, the cold night air passing in through the window, and the short time journey on the seemingly never-ending vacant road- it was more than just enough refreshing. I smiled to myself, letting my eyes get closed in uttermost comfort. The quietude now became the savior of my stressed weary self, and I was going to embrace the full of it.
I opened my eyes after a while, finding Jimin staring at me. He immediately looked forward, making me squint at his reaction.
There was not even a pin dropping sound inside the car except for the low sound coming from the turned on radio. Jimin was sparing glances at me occasionally while driving; probably in try to hit any casual conversation to eliminate the heavy soundlessness.
'Are you feeling comfortable, Y/N?' he finally decided to speak. 'Yes, Jimin ssi. I am totally fine.' I flashed a humble smile, 'Thank you for your lift. I really appreciate it.'
'It's nothing. No need to give thanks.' He smiled back. 'By the way, how long have you been living in Korea?' He asked again after a while.
'It's been a few years.' 'Is this your first job?' I answered slowly while staring outside the window.
'Umm, in a literal sense, no. I used to do part-time jobs at a few places earlier. But yeah, this is my first permanent job in any company.'
'Getting into a post with high objectives from the very first seems to be a little scary.' 'Err...yeah, it's going to be tough but, I will manage.' I replied. It was silent for a while again.
'You don't talk much, do you?' After some hours, Jimin was the one to talk first again. 'Ye?' I shifted my gaze towards him. 'You are barely talking except for the time when you are required to give me directions. It's just me who's trying to talk. Why have you become so quiet? Are you feeling uncomfortable? I don't like to remain seated silently like this. Tell me about...yourself.' He spoke.
'It's not like that.' I gave a naive faint smile and became quiet again. I was tired, after the long day of work. But before that the main reason was, it was him. Something about him scares me a little bit, he's intimidating and unapproachable despite his strokes of amiability. I am not the talker, I never was. For the sake of my task, I know I should talk to extract info. But...I fail with my ability in this case.
Jimin sighed giving up spiking any conversation in lack of response, 'Hmph! You are really quiet and boring, manager noona.'
Yep, only with you.
He moved his hand to increase the volume of the radio in order to lessen the silent atmosphere. A woman was reading out news on the channel-
'-----3 police officers were injured and hospitalized. Regarding the perpetrators responsible for the gang war. some anonymous eyewitnesses of the gang war told that a fight arose between two of the gangsters that later led to this big gang war. It isn't a new scene of conflict for these gangs GOT8 and NDT. The police succeeded arresting some of the gangsters on the spot. The department is confidently stating that, through interrogation, they will soon be able to apprehend the rest. Due to the riot, a few of the public along with personal properties got damaged. 7 people were injured but luckily, none is in criti----'
The radio glitched, singing out any random music next moment as Jimin changed the channel to another. I made a disappointed face. I was eager to hear the whole news. Instead of protesting, I just asked him politely, 'Jimin ssi, can you please change the channel after the news get over? The news was kinda interesting.'
'You don't have to listen to this crappy stuff; they are no good for your novice ears.' Hard enough to leave unnoticed, in his voice, there was undeniably a frosty ice held all of a sudden. I pursed my lips in annoyance, wondering why he started acting like that, as if it the news had hurt his own ego. Gangsters, mobsters, criminals elsewhere- they never pay a damn about what happened to others who has the same profession as them, the only time they do if they hear someone is getting arrested. It's one of the things I had seen until now.
They see themselves in the same situation as them, they get alarmed for their own future. When we say 'us', 'us' holds a common trait, even if it's the trait of being human. For them, 'us' is the relatability, they are human but alike, bads, they have the same line of the future. The quandary destiny, still the future of their own accomplishment. Life is a path of risks, in both good terms and bad terms. What they had as their reasons, concern comes with selfish rules.
'Isn't it good that those gangsters got arrested?' Knowing that it might irk him, I couldn't get rid of the greed of initiating a conversation on that topic, 'but those police officers…Aish!' I made a tsk, 'I hope they get better soon.'
'It won't be a big deal if the department loses one or two of their officers. They have a whole bunch of them.' The way he talked was inexpressive, 'The police deserved it. Actually, they deserve more than that.'
'But they got injured while trying to stop the gang war. Other people died because of their feud, properties are damaged and that- how could you be so ungrateful towards them?' I could feel the patch of light anger getting knotted in my voice, even though I knew this would lead me to nothing but heat, I couldn't stop myself from snapping back.
'The gangs could get matters resolved among themselves. It was the police who are responsible for their current condition.' In his voice, there was a touch of mock.
'Why are you blaming the police?' I scoffed, 'it was their fault? They were carrying out their duties. Do you think if you did a crime, you can leave without getting punished for it? You killed people once, now you are killing yourselves. Funny and so human! The police try to stop you, they deserve to die!' Despite trying, the words came out my mouth a bit rough. Being in a profession similar to the police's, mocking them felt like a needle thrown towards me too. 'What I am trying to say is, you-'
My tongue struck at its place as Jimin's head turned towards me in a jolt, decreasing the distance between our faces by a few inches. His eyes were ice, the cruelest gaze, not the ones I encountered before, his was another level. His face was hard and straight, he appeared like a brutal murderer. Before me, I could see the devil itself. I squirmed myself with brief shock to the edge of the seat.
'Gang wars work like that,' His voice could kill souls in silence, 'Either you live or you die. No one cares about you, there's no time. In this world, you need to secure your own position and gain power on your behalf, either in a good way or in a bad way. It's the survival law. No one to help. The gangs were just maintaining the law, who the hell is police to get into their business, huh?' his eyes sparkled while speaking. He was definitely not the idol Jimin you see on the screen before
'That's not true, I-'
'That IS true. No one is going to care for you, no one is going to care for me. Everybody's on his own. You bloom a flower, you are gonna take care of it. You bloom a dream, you are gonna work to make it come true. Not me, not anyone else.' He looked away and turned front.
I stopped grasping cover of the seat, trying to understand what just happened.
What was that? Did I get him this angry?
Even though what he just said, were indeed true.
'If it was me,' He added looking back at me then hissed, 'I would just shred those pretty police heads on the city street under broad daylight.'
I looked at him, I looked at him for a long while. A guy who I never saw before. He was not Jimin, he was not the guy who got me on the mission night, he was not the sweet and cute idol from the fansign. And he was not the teasing and amiable one I had met before just now. Who was he?
I retained back to my previous straight position, 'You seem into these kinds of stuff a…bit, aren't ya?' He paused for a moment then replied without turning his head, 'Mwae? Uh…these things always remain on the news, that's why…'
Yeah.
It was again silent in the car.
This time it was Jimin who didn't want to talk anymore. I could feel his temper still persistent, burning and creating invisible flames and smokes in the atmosphere. One thought that appeared on my mind.
Why does he have so much hatred towards the police? Being a gangster, it is normal to have so but, his one, it seemed different...?
Hmm...
I need to know him more.
I asked to get the course diverted, 'May I ask you something, Jimin ssi? Do you often drive like this on your own?' I wasn't expecting him to reply, nevertheless, he did, 'No, not very often, Today I just felt like driving myself. So I went with it.'
'I see that's why your driving skills are not that good.'
'What do you mean?' Aw, my poke hit him, I see.
'You stumbled quite a few times while taking turns. And you seemed a little troubled while changing lanes too.'
'I do face some problems I will admit. But don't worry, I won't surely get you killed.' Though he said it in a light way, there rested no smile on his face. It was me who got the atmosphere ruined, therefore, it was me who was gonna fix it.
'Jimin ssi, can I ask, are you mad?' He replied in a jiffy, 'No, what should I be for?' But the sternness didn't slip an inch off his facial expression while he spoke.
'I am sorry, I didn't mean to heat up the talk.' I flickered my eyes pursing my lips to pull up a cute expression. I knew it was my strong point, Korean boys in here always fell for that. Likely, I could see a tiny smirk flashing on his lips but it faded instantly. He didn't spare any reply.
'I said sorry...are you not willing to talk to me properly yet?' I pouted, using all of my tricks I used to cool down people often. People, Liza.
'Call me oppa then.' His answer came in a surprising way, 'You had been calling me Jimin ssi from the very first time and I am hating it. It sounds really formal.' His voice was comparatively eased this time.
My eyebrow arched up itself, 'I am sorry, but I don't call oppa. It sounds...cringey?' 'Why cringey? Where are your manners? I am older than you, you should call me that.'
'Are you?' I put on a fake disbelieving expression. 'Ain't I?' he raised his eyebrows, 'How old are you then? Lemme check your ID.'
'Not necessary.' I ignored his look. He snickered, 'Yah, Stop lying. You are my dongsaeng.' He murmured. 'None of our staffs is younger than us. Now that you are one, it's going to be fun.'
'Fun like what? I don't understand.'
'Nothing,' He smirked again, how dare he? 'Call me oppa or else I won't reply you from now on.'
'You won't?' he pouted, as I revealed no further syllable with my lips all pursed, 'so, you are stubborn and quiet and introvert. Alright.' With that, the conversation between us met its end. Good. Thank you.
The car kept running straight on the lane. As it pretty soon reached my everyday familiar streets, I was getting more relieved. No sooner I was about to reach my home.
'Why are you speeding up like this? It is really dangerous, Jimin ssi.' I said, noticing how the car had started gaining more acceleration little by little with the passage of time.
'I can drive fair well. So you don't have to worry.' I have seen that already, haven't I? He didn't even yield to put a lesser force on the asbestos after my words.
'Jimin ssi, please slow down. It's scary.'
'Call me oppa or I will keep doing it.' His words made me widen my eyes in disbelief. 'Are you seriously doing this for that stupid thing?' My mouth hung down more as he spoke out his words, 'You can see that.'
'Ok, you wanna hear it? Here it is. Oppa! Now stop!' I yelled on his face. 'Ah no, not in this way. A little cute, like the way you were acting a moment before.'
If I ever knew any person who could be the most impossible in character, Park Jimin seemed like beating all of them. Hot, cold, cute, cringe. Just how many sides of him am I going to see?
I gritted my teeth and made a heart with my arms, 'OPPA-YA!!!' He giggled, his face relaxed as soon as he did to the old Jimin, 'There you go, see. This is how you should do it all the time.' He was finally laughing in a casual way.
'Okay, but Jimin ssi! Drive looking front.' 'Whah? You are calling me that again!'
'I said LOOK FRONT, JIMIN!' I let out a yell. Our car was running along the tail of a three-way road. Just some meters far, a station wagon was moving from the left to right side.
'Shit!' Jimin quickly tried to hit the brake, but instead, his sole pushed on the accelerator, gaining more speed. 'What the fuck are you doing?' I screamed. The car was literally flying that time, getting totally out of control. 'WE'RE ABOUT TO CRASH!' Jimin shrieked back, taking his hands off the steering wheel to cover his eyes.
I immediately took my seat belt off. Leaning to the side, I whirled the steering wheel hitting the brake the hardest I could from that position. The car slid dangerously almost touching the station wagon. A loud horn buzzed in the air, accompanied by a faint scream that arose from inside of the other car. I flew down due to inertia, bumping against my seat. My eyes closed immediately in reaction, imagining the horrific scene that was about to take place.
A few seconds passed with nothing happening. I opened my eyes realizing that the car finally had stood still. My body was still trembling in shock, my heart bounced like a tennis ball. I again shut my eyes tightly, taking my time to calm down.
'Y/N? Are you alright?' I felt small warm breaths touching the top of my head. The surface I was leaning against moved up and down constantly. The combination of departing warmth and elegant scent, it was alluring and protective, making me feel secure from all ways. When I opened my eyes again, I found myself leaning against Jimin's chest clutching his shirt with my nails. He was staring at me with concern in his eyes, his hand rested on my waist.
'Are you okay?' he brought his face close to take a proper view. I quickly got myself off of him and sat back on my seat. Either due to the fact of being still in fear or being too close to him, my heart started to beat faster in an uncontrollable way, as if never able to calm itself down.
The car with which we were about to crash was nowhere to be seen. Both of us sat back in silence for some while. 'Thank goodness that we didn't collide,' Jimin gave a weak smile mixed in guilt and sheepishness.
'We should move now, shan't we?' With no reply from my side, he decided to add.
'Get off.' my voice came out in a calm way. 'What?' He asked, confused.
'I said get off.'
'I don't understand.' He wrinkled his forehead, trying to extract a proper meaning of what I just said, 'are you kicking me out of my own car?' Letting out a sigh, I got off the car and walked turning round to the driver's side. Opening the door, I looked at him and ordered, 'Move.'
'Wha-'
'MOVE!!' Jimin immediately moved to the passenger's seat like a silent bee. I went into the driver's seat and moved the car to get it back on the street.
'Huh? Are you gonna drive instead of me?' Jimin asked in perplexity. 'Till I reach my home, yes. Letting you drive is like bringing death to oneself. After I drive myself home, you can go to your dorm or to anywhere else with your crazy driving, then crash and die. I won't give a damn! At least I will remain alive. That's what all matters! Your fans can cry their hearts out for you, but as I said, I don't. give. a. damn.' I spoke in my coldest voice.
'How rude...' he pouted. No sooner, those pink plump lips elongated being graced a small unlikeable titter, 'You aren't exactly the type I thought. And you know, you look kinda hot with that mad face.'
'SHUT UP!' I shot him a glare making him get silent. But those curved up pink shapes, the grin upon them was never fading away. I just drove like I had to and sighed.
What a pabo...
I stopped the car in front of my house then hopped out of it. Looking back down, I said, 'Thanks anyway. Even though half of it should be given to me.' Moving back to the driver's seat, Jimin crossed his arms on the steering wheel and simpered, 'Don't I deserve anything more than that?'
'Annyeong. Drive safe!' I walked towards the front door. I could hear his laugh from behind. The car soon went out of sight. I got myself into the house.
At least now I know, it's not him who carries out the driving part in their mission.