Respite: a period of rest or relief from something difficult or unpleasant.
*
I had never held something so small that was so heavy before.
Pulling Mia out of the water, seeing her just lifeless in my hands, I felt I couldn't breathe.
Alexis rubbed my back as I hunched over in my seat, head in hands. We were all in the waiting bay at the hospital. Ava and Robyn came back from the water cooler handing out plastic cups for us to take. When I didn't respond to Robyn when she stood in front of me, she kneeled on the floor, and all but force-fed the cup to me, refusing to pull it away from my face unless I took it. She offered me a flat smile as I took it off her, the plastic cold on my fingers as I straightened.
It was then I noticed how uncomfortable she seemed, looking around the hospital waiting room, pulling at the now fitted choker around her neck as she examined the walls. I wondered if the bruising had faded or there was still a distinctive line to cover. I offered Ava a quick look when Robyn started tightening the fabric.
Estelle and Amia were in the middle of convincing the receptionists to give them some coloured markers or pencils, for a chatterbox they had made from an old newspaper in the magazine stand. Upon their success, they had an in-depth discussion about what colours to put where and what to make the predictions. Their enthusiasm seemed forced, but I thought it was to avoid having to deal with why we were in the hospital in the first place.
Bonnie sat across from me, having been given a bandage for her neck and offered a psyche eval she declined, she had said very little since the incident. Aside from the doctors asking her the occasional question and explaining once what had happened, she ignored when the nurses tried to inquire some things, ignored the police when they asked if she wanted to press charges and said nothing to the information that her parents were on their way.
She glared at her knees, the corner of her mouth occasionally twitching, but otherwise, she seemed relaxed in her wheelchair.
Ava sat on the other side of me, offering a sigh. "Not gonna lie, when I came to the dorm, I didn't think we'd be going to the hospitals for these reasons," she confessed, drawing circles into the condensation forming on the outside of the cup. "I expected maybe a sports injury, complications from a wheelchair, the occasional ferret bite, hell, Alexis walking into a door and breaking her nose."
Alexis cracked a smile, her hand still resting on my back.
"But this is just…" she blew a raspberry at the situation and rubbed her temple. Robyn sat next to her and put an arm around her, offering a sideways embrace.
"It is a bit much, isn't it?" Alexis commented. Despite being blind, her eyes gave a lot way when she was in distress. They would rest on the floor like they were heavy or would give off a fragile expression, occasionally they would look around the room with uncertainty. I wondered what she was able to see right now, with all the nurses walking around and the occasional hospital machinery.
I took her other hand in mine and held it tight for assurance.
A doctor walked in, the one who had examined Bonnie and oversaw Mia's care. Upon seeing him, Bonnie came to life and rolled towards him. "How's Mia?" she asked.
The doctor offered a smile to all of us, reassuring. "She'll be just fine. She's woken up recently, and when she's ready, the nurse will get you. I'm sure she'll be thrilled to see some familiar faces."
We all thanked him, each breathing a sigh of relief, but he hadn't walked a step away when Bonnie also asked, "What about Amelia? Is she okay?"
We all exchanged puzzled looks, including the doctor, who cleared his throat before saying, "She's pending an investigation currently, but she's stable now as well. Her parents are on their way in now."
Bonnie nodded, "Do you know what happened?" she asked, "Because she doesn't usually act like that. That's not her."
The doctor cleared his throat. "I'm afraid Amelia and her family want to keep that private," he informed, "Perhaps when her parents come here, or the next time you speak with her, they may tell you, but otherwise I'm not at liberty to say."
Bonnie's gaze slowly dropped as she nodded, "Okay. Thank you."
When the doctor walked away, Bonnie slowly moved to the side of the lobby to avoid blocking people. When the silence started to grow uncomfortable, Estelle wandered to each of us to 'predict our future' with the chatterbox. Apparently, my future is unknown, as the nurse came to collect us before Estelle could tell me.
We all crowded into the private hospital room, unlike when we all came in for Robyn, Mia wasn't attached at all limbs to machinery. She had an oxygen aid fitted in her nose, and a handful of cords were connected to a heart monitor. Whether stuff had been moved or things would be added later, we didn't know. For now, we were all happy to see Mia awake and offering a weak smile at the sight of us.
I watched the girls restrain themselves from hugging Mia, not wanting to overwhelm her or disturb any of the important looking tubes. I stood at the foot of her bed, Alexis leaning on my arm, as we listened to the overlapping noise from the girls. Mia didn't offer any answers to their frantic questions, merely blinked and shared her attention with each of them when one was louder than the other. I was partially worried about how she looked. Mia's skin was still a sickly pale, not as pale as when I pulled her from the water, but there was a cold look to her skin. And, understandably, she looked exhausted and uncomfortable in the hospital gown.
Bonnie sat beside Mia and reached forwards, resting her hands on her sister's front and resting her head on the edge of her bed. Mia lifted one of her hands and held Bonnie's arm. Bonnie lifted her head, fitting her arms under her chin to prop herself up.
"Low key, I don't think I've ever been more thankful for your clinginess," Bonnie remarked. Mia smiled, somewhat embarrassed, but still a smile. Quite suddenly, Bonnie's eyes welled with tears, and her voice croaked, "But honestly, sis, never do that again, okay?"
Mia was just as surprised by the sudden change, blinking profusely as she managed to sit up, it was a struggle to watch, prompting Robyn to help her.
Mia winced when she was upright, pressing a hand against her sternum as she turned to Bonnie and tried to sign. Bonnie grabbed her hands before she could say anything. "Mia, you have no idea how thankful I am that you were there. That you somehow stopped it but…" Bonnie shook her head, "That was dumb luck, Mia. Dumb Goddamn luck." She started crying, her hands holding Mia's so tightly they both trembled.
Ava touched Robyn's arm, motioning for them to leave the room. "We'll give you guys a minute," she announced, giving everyone an authoritative look.
Silently, the other agreed, each of us filing out of the room and standing in the hallway.
I could Bonnie's words on my way out, almost forcing me to stay within earshot to hear them. I leant next to the door and tilted my ear to them.
"I mean, what if Landon didn't come looking for you? What if he wasn't nearby? I couldn't help you, Mia, I could barely help myself," Bonnie spluttered. "This… thing we have going, all those things you do for me, that you think you have to, it's got to stop." There was a pause. "Mia, you don't owe me anything. No more then I've ever owed you. You didn't cause the car crash five years ago, you didn't turn our parents into helicopter paranoids. None of that was your fault, so why are you punishing yourself with crap that can get you killed?"
I so desperately wanted to peer inside, to see what Mia was saying in the stretch of silence that followed or wished for a miracle and that she would just start speaking, but eventually Bonnie continued; "Mia, don't lie about this. This is the second time you could've died coming after me this year alone, and who knows how many times in the last few years. You tried to jump off the Platform at the resort, you've run into traffic after something as stupid as a tennis ball, you've almost been kidnapped because people see you as easier to catch."
Another pause.
"They would be devastated, Mia. We all would. Mum and Dad love you just as much as they love me," Bonnie assured, "They didn't adopt you just to be some attention sponge or a basket case, or being the easier-to-kidnap child. They adopted you because we needed you, you needed us, we needed each other to actually be happy for Christ's sake." I had to peer in, inching my head to look at the pair, Mia's eyes puffy as she signed while in obvious distress.
Bonnie was in a similar state, resting her forehead against her hands as she tried not to cry. Her breath shook when she said, "Mia, I just want you to be okay."
Mia wiped her eyes, aggressively rubbing them to try and hide her tears.
"I don't want to wake up one day and not have a little sister anymore. I don't want to even think about those moments when I thought I lost you today," Bonnie informed, "I don't want to lose you because you thought you had this unpayable debt to me, Mia. I'm incredibly selfish in saying that, but it's true, I don't want you to die because of me."
Mia dropped her hands from her eyes, only able to offer a shattered expression that almost made me burst into the room to comfort her myself, when slowly she signed, "I'm sorry, Bonnie."
Bonnie shook her head, tears clearly streaming down her cheeks now, as quickly wiped them and replied, "I'm sorry too." She reached up and embraced Mia again, Mia this time leant over and resting her head by her sister's, ignoring the restrictions of the machinery around her.
After this heart-warming moment, everyone else came back into the room, trying to make light of the situation by teasing Mia for her crying as she laughed and wiped her eyes. Then came the serious business: the chatterbox.
Mia had that childish glee at the sight of one as Estelle sat at the foot of the bed and went through a session with Mia.
We were in there for maybe an hour, me sitting on the sidelines watching the girls each have a go at the chatterbox, a nurse came in once to see how things were, and Simmons arrived with a small bundle of carnation flowers since they were 'allergy friendly' that Mia thought were pretty. Alexis had somehow been promoted from girlfriend-sitting-next-to-me-in-a-chair to she's-eighteen-and-therefore-much-cooler-girl that Mia wanted to sit next to.
During all the interaction, Bonnie had set herself aside to look out the window. The once decently clear afternoon sun now a navy sheet speckled with sparkly stars that stretched on as far as the eye could see. I shifted seats until I was next to her, offering to open the blinds a little more so she could see.
"If you don't mind," Bonnie asked in a small voice.
"Of course," I answered rising from my seat and making the awkward guesswork of which way to pull the curtain even more excruciating to accomplish. Eventually, I managed, and the night sky was Bonnie's to behold.
I sat side on in one of the chairs and looked out the window also.
Entirely to be cliché, I started to count the stars and wondered how many of them I had already seen before. When I was younger, to keep me from disturbing Dad and his workmates at night, he would tell me if I couldn't sleep to just look out the window, or prop my head out of the tent, or just stare up at the sky because we were sleeping in nothing but sleeping bags, and just count the stars until they all disappeared. Archaeology was often an all-nighter pursuit for my Dad.
I had made it to about thirty before Bonnie's voice disrupted my count. "Have I said thank you yet, Landon?" she asked. I noticed she was rubbing her fingers together.
"Yes, you have," I informed.
Bonnie paused again, her eye dropping to her hands as if noticing how nervous she looked, and made them stop. "Thank you," her voice was small, the meekness reminding me of the first day we had met at Windmill Lake, she sniffed, "Seriously. Thank you."
I put a hand on her back. "No more tears, Bon," I softly said, "Come on, no more tears."
Bonnie sniffed again and rubbed her eyes before she could start crying. "Hey, I'm going to the vending machine in the lobby. Do you want anything?"
"Can I go with you?" Bonnie requested, rolling her chair about so she was facing me.
I frowned, "Don't you want to be with Mia?"
Bonnie had a flat smile, "I think she's happy with the attention for the moment. I just want to move around," she explained.
I nodded, looking to the other girls and calling, "I'm going to the vending machine. You guys want anything?"
After a handful of 'no thanks', 'Doritos if they've got any' and just an exclamation of 'chocolate!' we headed for the lobby. I fished through my wallet for any amount of coins I had stashed there and started feeding them into the machine.
"Your advice actually works," Bonnie stated as I scanned for the correct number combination for chocolate.
"Oh?"
She nodded, "I didn't antagonise her, and when she got too close, I elbowed her in the face," Bonnie made a sad smile, "That kinda distracted her for a while, but I was too freaked out to run away properly, and my chair flipped." The chocolate fell from the shelf, and I went to pick it up. "I wanted to yell out for help, but we were next to a windmill. I don't even know if there was anyone to yell out to. How did you find us?"
I paused, holding the candy in my hand as I considered it. Truthfully, it was dumb luck, just like she said. I followed one of the pathways on my bike and just so happened to see Amelia and Bonnie, at first, I didn't think anything was wrong, but then I saw Mia and the box cutter, and I just knocked Amelia down so she wouldn't hurt Bonnie. I tried to make it a bit funnier by saying I tracked her phone, but it barely got a smirk from Bonnie.
As I continued getting the vending machine food, I found I was fifty cents short.
I groaned. "Hey Bonnie, do you have any coins on you?" I asked.
I had left Bonnie next to me, I know that for a fact because as I bought vending goods, I placed them on her lap to carry. Both she and the vending machine food were gone.
I cursed under my breath as I scanned the lobby for her, eventually abandoning my $2.30 in the vending machine to find her. I was lucky in my search, down the first hallway I was allowed to walk down, I caught sight of Bonnie's wheelchair in another patient room.
I leaned on the doorframe about to call out to her when I saw who was in bed: Amelia.
A part of me was angry at Amelia, just overall, for what she did, even if there was something else going on beneath whatever surface she was hiding under, but seeing Amelia lying there with her arms tightly strapped to the bed bars and forced to do nothing but stare at the ceiling was painful to look at. It was made even more unsettling by the slightly bruising that had begun on her face, stretching to her eyes.
Bonnie rolled up to her side, startling the man and woman sitting by the windows I assumed to be Amelia's parents. This prompted Amelia to open her eyes and acknowledge Bonnie sitting next to her, a strange blankness in her eyes.
"Did I do that?" she asked, gesturing with her chin to Bonnie's neck.
Bonnie offered a nod.
Amelia scoffed, her mother asking Bonnie to leave. "Don't be paranoid, mother," Amelia said with the shallowest hint of humour, "It's not like I'm going to attack her now, is it?"
With a short, shaky breath, Bonnie asked, "Are you going to be okay?"
Amelia licked something inside her mouth, likely her teeth, as she considered the question before answering, "Probably." The nonchalant of her answer caused a worried exchange with her parents. She sniffed, wincing. "My nose is a bit worse for wear, but it's fine. I should probably be asking you that," Amelia said, struggling to sit up without the restraints digging into her wrists, "They said I drowned your little sister. Is she alright?"
Bonnie slowly nodded, "Yes. She's okay now."
Amelia made a clicking noise with her teeth, "Great." After a calm moment, she all but screamed, "Why're you here?" The volume change startled her parents, but Bonnie didn't even flinch, "Is it to rub my nose in the fact that I didn't succeed or something? Came to tell me yourself you're pressing charges now?" Her Mother tried to calm her down, but the moment she touched her, Amelia recoiled. "No! No!" she shook her head, turning to Bonnie with tearful eyes, "Why are you here? I should be the last person you'd want to see."
Bonnie didn't answer straight away, and for a moment I thought she was going to just leave. Her hands were holding so tightly to the armrest of her chair, and everything was stiff. Bonnie was clearly angry, beyond livid with Amelia, but there was a strange tenderness that I didn't know Bonnie was capable of for people other than Mia.
She reached her hand out and held two of Amelia's fingers in the restraints. "I forgive you, Amelia," Bonnie informed slowly.
Those four words sent the room into silence, surprising Amelia with wide eyes. Bonnie tightened her grip on her fingers before she picked up one of the chocolates, I had gotten from the vending machine, and placed it on her lap. "Good luck," Bonnie said simply, slowly backing up from the bed and turning to exit the room.
Amelia looked down at the chocolate with remarkable disinterest, as she muttered, "Goodbye."
It was a very breathy final word, but Bonnie heard it as well, stopping her in her tracks. A moment of guilt seemed to rest on her face before straightening her posture and continuing to the hallway.
When she saw me, her expression faltered, the corners of her mouth twitching as she tried to keep a neutral expression, eventually biting the insides of her cheeks and trying to joke. "Make friends you said," she forced a smile, "It'll be good for you, you said." She reached out and half-heartedly punched my leg, "Last time I take your advice."
I smirked as I crossed my arms, "Let's go back to Mia and the others."
Bonnie nodded, "Yeah."
"Want me to push your chair?" I offered.
She shook her head, "No. I'm fine on my own." We started for down the hallway and just managed to make it to the mouth of the next when we heard:
"Bonnie?"
Bonnie widened her eyes as she glanced over her shoulder, when I followed her eye, I saw a man and a woman standing at the desk. I could immediately tell they were Bonnie's parents. Her Father was a tall man with the same black hair and affiliation with the colour blue, from his eyes to his navy suit, while the woman had the same complexion, hair and small look. They each looked as if they had come from a formal event, or at least the Mother did, as she was dolled up and dressed in a flattering but sparkly violet dress.
At the sight of Mia, the woman, ignoring her skinny heels, rushed to her daughter and kneeled before her, on the edge of hysterics. "Oh sweetheart," her voice was laced with a motherly concern as she examined Bonnie's face and the bandage on her neck, "Oh my baby."
"Mum!" Bonnie whined but couldn't hide her smirk as her Mother hugged her and lingered, "You're embarrassing me."
"Oh, that's my job," I heard her muffled voice.
Bonnie's Dad had a much calmer aura about him when he approached, while clearly distressed at the sight of his daughter, while his wife catered to her, he acknowledged me. "You must be Landon Becks," he said holding a hand out to shake, "I'm William Ranks, Bonnie's Father."
My throat felt tight as I shook his hand, trying not to have a pansy shake as I managed, "I-I know who you are, sir." Billionaire politician with an impeccably positive reputation involving his efforts to improve environmental efforts in overseas countries as well as his wife's efforts, Allison Ranks, in the human rights movements across the world. I could practically feel my heart leaping from my chest at the sight of them, it was almost painful.
William Ranks offered a humble nod as he retracted his hand, "But of course. You have been taking care of our daughters all this time, and the other girls in the dormitory I imagine. It's nice to finally put a face to the name. My daughters speak highly and often about you."
I gave Bonnie's a side glance, "Do they now?"
Bonnie's cheeks heated up as she pushed her Mother off her. "Okay Mum, that's enough," she hastily said.
"Oh, I'm just so glad my babies are okay," Allison gushed as she stood up, still appearing somewhat overwhelmed but otherwise fine.
Now that Mrs Ranks was done fawning over Bonnie, Mr Ranks had the chance to, his approach clearly being the one Bonnie preferred as it involved less touching. He had placed a hand on both her cheeks and gave her a quick kiss on the forehead, "We're just glad you're okay, Bon-Bon."
It took every fibre of my being not to smirk, or laugh, or even breathe upon hearing that nickname. I forced a very unsubtle sigh as I tried, "Bon-Bon?"
Bon-Bon had a go at her Father for calling her that, a moment which involved a lot of hitting, beet-red faces and unintelligible muttering.
Allison Ranks turned to me, offering her own hand in greetings as she introduced herself, "We can't thank you enough, Landon. Truly, you are a blessing." The hug was unexpected, but I think I managed to save it from appearing unwanted.
"I'm just glad I could help, I consider Bonnie and Mia my friends," I informed as she composed herself.
"Where is Mia?" Allison asked, "Where's my baby girl?"
After consulting some of the nurses, who needed to know they were Bonnie and Mia's parents, we were all guided back to Mia's room. Mia was sitting cross-legged on her sheets, looking into the chatterbox Amia was now holding.
"Oh, Mia!" Allison exclaimed.
Mia seemed startled by the voice as her head jerked to Allison. Upon seeing the almost franticness of Mrs Ranks, the girls on the bed disbanded, opting to sit on the chairs or the floor.
For a second, I thought Allison was going to throw herself on Mia like she had with Bonnie, and I worried about Mia freaking out, but Allison approached her slower and sat on the edge of the bed reaching her hands out to touch her. Mia's eyes were full at the sight of her, her heart monitor showing a hitch in her heartbeat. Allison seemed to notice this and retracted her hands, almost appearing frightened for a moment. But she shuffled closer and placed her hand on Mia's cheek.
With this touch, Allison smiled as she gently stroked Mia's cheek, "My poor baby."
Mia's eyes slowly became glassy, her lip beginning to quiver as she leant into her Mother's touch. Allison reached forwards and hugged Mia, prompting Mia to all at once become a fit of trembles and to quietly sob into her Mother's shoulder. Allison's voice was gentle and soothing as she petted Mia on the back, "I know baby, I know. Shh. Mummy's here. Mummy's here now."
William stood by me at the door, clearly taken aback by the scene of big pieces of hospital equipment surrounding little Mia. William approached the pair, sitting beside his wife and offering his hand when Mia pulled out of the hug. Mia clutched onto his fingers with her small hand, trying to catch her breath as she sniffed. "We're so glad you're okay," William assured, a catch in his throat.
Allison held Mia close to her bosom while William held her hand, the moment so overwhelming my eyes began to sting. Bonnie, on the other hand, had tears streaming down her cheeks at the sight of her family until William beckoned her over.