...
...Since when?
Why am I... alone?
...
...I can't remember a thing.
What happened...?
At that time, my eyes could only see endless darkness as its poison embraced me. And... it felt like I was floating in an unknown space with no foothold whatsoever within sight.
Then again, I couldn't see a thing there, so my vision couldn't be relied on. My hands were cold— no, my whole body was freezing.
"...I'm cold."
Arms wrapped around my knees, I tried to deaden the ominous chill, but it didn't go away. Everything I did to make this feeling disappear was met with a rebarbative sensation coursing through my veins.
I felt like crying.
My mind dithered for a while, confused and dubious as to why I was in that awful place. Did I do something wrong again?
Perhaps.
Did I hurt an innocent person again?
A part of me didn't deny it, so I probably did.
Did I... Did I kill someone out of hatred again?
...
"...I wonder why I'm still alive... after those sins, I had committed."
Suddenly, a wide, rectangular screen appeared before my eyes, blinding me for a moment. The faint red light it displayed suggested some form of a video projection of a scene.
"...Ha..."
The video was a bit weak on the resolution aspect, but I could still make out the details without difficulty. On the other side, a reddish monster— an amalgam of crimson crystals was rampaging in a narrow hallway. It had no eyes or limbs, and if I had to describe how it looked like without being too far off, a lump of flesh suited the picture.
Different shades of red crystals being mixed together— a towering, moving sculpture.
"...Why is it... mad? Is it... angry?"
Somehow, the malice from that monster resonated with me, as if I understood the reason why it was in that state. The monster was crying because of a promise... a promise it refused to renege. A promise the creature wanted to fulfill, no matter the cost.
"...Poor you."
My hand touched the screen projection, a scant attempt to assuage the monster's wrath and unbridled anger. It didn't respond even after I called after it, so I kept my hand on the screen with wishful thinking that my thoughts would reach it. I wouldn't have any compunction if I could at least reach out towards the pitiful monster.
"...Hm?"
As the monster sent tendrils and whips all over the place, a few silver robots halted in front it, maybe to put a stop to this destruction. On the inside, I was cheering for them, but alas, their presence was there to be scoffed at.
The monster swung one arm that sprouted out from its side, and the robots were immediately crushed underneath it.
"G r r r H A O o o U r g G H!"
The monster let out a cry that felt foreign to my ears— it had a strange sharpness to it which blanched me.
"H H H v L H o O O P p E E e R g h H h!"
"...Is it calling for someone?"
In between the incomprehensible cries, the monster appeared to be calling someone's name. I jumped to that conclusion because a sense of longing and sadness welled up inside me, every time the monster called that 'name'.
It didn't have any mouth— at least on the surface so I could only assume the awful cries came from inside the monster itself, despite how ludicrous it sounded like.
"H v V V V h i i I I A a R G h H g G H!"
Boom!
A sturdy wall next to the monster crumbled after it crashed against it. As if trying to sate an unquenchable thirst, the monster repeated what it did and destroyed everything in its path. Powerful tendrils cracked the floor, its huge body crushed anyone brave enough to cross it.
The poor thing kept on its rampage without any care in the world. Anger, frustration, sadness, loathing, seething rage poured out incessantly as it went about its business.
"...There are more people over there," I muttered.
Once the screen showed what was behind a hallway's junction, I tilted my head in confusion. My mind couldn't comprehend what... or why those people were there. Is that really them? This question kept being hurled at me every time I tried to make sense of what I was seeing.
It couldn't be them... right?
The screen projection showed three people staring at the monster— an eleven or twelve-year-old child, a dark-haired teenager, and... a girl about the same age as mine. She had beautiful, lustrous dark hair tied into a braid as it swayed behind her back.
"Aya...?"
The girl's turquoise eyes stared at the monster—no— directly at me with her mouth opened wide. At that time, the screen's viewpoint was parallel to the monster's, so perhaps I was just imagining things. This angle the screen showed me suggested that I was the monster itself.
...
But that girl was definitely Aya, and the guy behind her was Eugene. I recognized those two without problem.
"Aya and... Eugene. What are they... doing here? Wait... I— Aaaaaaaaack!"
A sharp pain shot throughout my brain suddenly, and what accompanied it was a torrent of memories, ones I forgot completely. They were the memories just before I was sent into this unknown void of a place.
"Aaaaaaaaack... Ugghhh..."
I realized, that these memories were sealed, unconsciously shoved into the back of my mind before. Was it on purpose? Even I didn't have the answer to that question, even though I should have.
These memories belonged to me and no one else. So by a simple process of elimination and slight focus on the right area, I was the only one capable of knowing such a thing.
Starting from when Kian attacked our fortress until when I hurt Ivar and succumbed to my own foolishness, namely letting my emotions took hold of my Aegis— I remembered each one vividly.
Huh... How stupid am I? I let myself be driven into the corner. I could have prevented it with no effort at all back then.
That monster... perhaps because I didn't want to suffer anymore, that my mind sealed those memories for me. This vile creature wreaking havoc was indeed me, and the one letting out those strange keening sound came from me myself.
"...I exist only to suffer, so why bother...?"
Looking back at Aya and the ones behind her, I sensed something strange. I remembered that I broke into this flying fortress, by myself. And yet Aya was here as well along with a few civilians. Did she break into this fortress before me?
Or is she an enemy?
"..."
The former sounded more realistic, given how much I knew about Aya. As for the latter, I didn't want to believe this girl— a close friend of mine would side with the C.U again. After everything that had transpired, I could not believe it.
"...Aya? Can you.. hear me?" I said.
With clenched fists, I slammed against the screen repeatedly out of desperation. "Aya! It's me! I-I'm here! Can you hear me?!"
Aya stood there, frozen, still unaware of the true identity of this creature—
"Ava...?"
Her eyes opened wide as she took a few steps back. "Is that really you?"
"A-Aya, there's no way that's Ava, right?" said Eugene.
"That is Ava! Those Aegis crystals... there's no mistaking it. But how come she is in this form? Aegis Takeover? No, that doesn't sound right... She doesn't seem to be conscious... but I can't rule that out just yet."
Aya brandished curved blades in each hand— red blades twice her size and thrice the length of her body. Eugene hastily grabbed at a little girl at his side and pulled back a bit.
"Ava! Can you hear me?! I don't want to fight you. I rather not... but I'm sure you can't control your body as it is. And I can feel what you're going through right now. The pain, the suffering, all those negative emotions mixed in... I can't bear to see you like this."
"Aya... I'm here! Let me out of here! Please!" I cried, slamming my fists onto the screen over and over.
"So please... if you can hear me. Calm down for a second!"
As soon as Aya said that, a red whip darted at her with unerring precision. Aware of the fact she couldn't dodge it, her blades sliced forward and struck the whip in time to divert its momentum to the side.
"You are like this... because no one is there for you! I can feel your Aegis crystals crying for your sake."
She dodged more whips coming at her and instructed Eugene along with the little girl to run away. They agreed unconditionally— and their feet took off to the direction they came from.
As Aya evaded and parried my attacks, she spoke to me:
"I know you're holding back! That's why I also know that you are better than this! Get yourself together and come out of there. Ava!"
After a feint to trick me into thinking that she would run away, her body twisted. She used her right leg as the center of the movement and darted at me, full speed ahead.
"As a sworn friend, it's my job to save you!" she screamed.
My Aegis crystals— the monstrous form it took— sent a large tendril to stop Aya from reaching me. She didn't want to parry it since doing so would deaden her momentum. And so, swiftly, the girl stepped to the side and continued her charge with determined eyes.
"...Eh?"
She realized an oddity and turned to look over her shoulder. The tendril I sent at her didn't retract back to my side so that must be why she decided to look back.
The tendril's purpose, in the first place, wasn't to hurt Aya or anything. It was as if this monstrous side of me knew such a thing couldn't hope to put a scant of scratch, on her fair skin.
""No!"" Aya and I screamed at the same time.
The tendril, after it failed to slice Aya, continued to dart towards the two people that were running away from the scene— specifically the little girl. My Aegis crystals had set her as a target.