Two sweaty bodies laid bare on the mattress, covered by a thick silk duvet to warm their privates. Beads of salty sweat dripped down from both their faces as it looked like the couple had just run a full marathon. The pungent aroma of musk and honey filled the nostrils of the pair as they took rapid breaths in. Beneath them lay puddles of fluids, mostly sweat, that stained their luxurious beddings. Not that the couple cared about money though. After a full eight hours of coiling around like snakes, Shin and Kanari separated, not by their desire, but by pure necessity.
"Ha… Ha… I think we overdid it..." Shin tiredly muttered out. Red markings criss crossed his chiselled body, and his lean chest kept falling and rising rapidly.
"Dra… Dragon's lust… I'd thou… thought it was just a legend... Who would have guessed… guessed that I would experience it first-hand?" Kanari was similarly out of breath. She was a combat-type Spirit User, and her Kumiho Spirit was not one to be scoffed at. However, Kanari didn't have limitless stamina. It took all that she had to keep up with Shin's insatiable desire so much so that Kanari was already having second thoughts for tempting Shin all those years.
Whatever… There was no point crying over spilt milk. Since Kanari had opened Pandora's Box, all she could do was accept Shin's Dragon Lust.
Kanari small head was comfortably snuggling on Shin's outreached arm. Just lying there on the bed with her loved one was enough to give her endless bliss. Kanari had chased Shin for so long, chipping away at his defensive walls bit by bit. Now that she'd got her goal, Kanari never wanted this happiness to end. Her fingers gently made circles around Shin's broad chest, tickling and greatly amusing the fatigued young man.
"Hmmm? What's wrong?"
"No, it's nothing… Just happy, that's all. It's not every day that we get to enjoy each other's company, worry-free."
"I see..." The black-haired man chuckled and didn't continue. Kanari was right, they were worry-free, mostly that is. Junius had been killed, and Ariel, Lily and Shizen had been avenged. The Allfather's plan had been foiled, and the Black Masks were forced to lay low. Millions, if not billions of lives had been saved when the Obsidian Gate had been destroyed. And last but not least, Shin was about to reunite with the people he held most dear.
With a beauty in his arms, Shin was perhaps in the happiest state he'd ever been in years. However… That made Shin exceedingly conflicted. His radiant smile that basked in the afterglow of sex was quickly replaced with a melancholic frown. Kanari was looking down at her man's chest, so it was obvious that she couldn't see that change. However, being the woman that stood next to Shin the most, Kanari could sense the overall change in mood.
Looking up, she asked: "What's the matter?"
"Kanari, I..." Shin was stunned at the sudden question. He looked down at those ruby-like eyes that screamed of innocence and concern. Kanari was genuinely worried about her man's mental state.
'No, I shouldn't hide anything from her… Kanari is going to be my wife. I should share everything that I'm thinking with her...' Shin steeled his resolve. Kanari had sacrificed so much for him, and Shin had barely reciprocated the feeling. If he wanted their relationship to work, Shin had to open up everything that he had to the gorgeous woman.
"Kanari, to be honest… I'm feeling very conflicted right now…"
"What do you mean?" Kanari blinked.
"See… When I first left Frie Mountain… When I first joined Imperius Academy, no… The reason why I joined Imperius Academy in the first place was to fulfil two main goals." Shin paused, his fingers climbing up Kanari's naked back and gently caressing her slender nape.
Purring, Kanari questioned: "What were they?"
"First, to bring Junius to justice, avenging Ariel and Sister Lily. And secondly… To chase Yggdrasil… To reach the Immortal Realm and to hopefully… revive Ariel." Shin didn't wait to see Kanari's response. In fact, it wouldn't be surprising if Kanari knew about the goals in the first place, given how close they were. "These two goals were what had defined my relentless drive to improve, to always train until my knuckles bled. To always seek improvement even in the darkest of hours. Everything that I've done to this point revolved around those two goals."
"Ah, right..." Kanari vaguely remembered Emma mentioning Shin's goals before. However, she had been too drunk with the recent happiness she'd had to remember.
"The first goal had been fulfilled. I've killed Junius with my own two hands, and on his deathbed, he'd repented. All of my training had paid off. The battle with Junius wasn't even a fight." Shin wasn't blowing his own horn. At his current level, few cultivators could challenge his power. His martial arts, overpowered yet versatile arsenal of spiritual abilities, his intellect in battle… Even Junius, the man widely feared as the Blade of Death, was barely a challenge for Shin's prowess. However, Shin didn't feel accomplished for making it this far. Instead, he felt… empty.
"I know that the Allfather and the Black Masks possess far more powerful enemies than Junius, however… My main objective for becoming stronger had been conquered. I don't know… I don't know how I can grow from here on out..." Shin honestly relayed his feelings onto Kanari, who had been listening intently from the very beginning.
"Shin..."
"That's not all, Kanari..." Shin shook his head. "Come with me..."
Gently removing Kanari's head off his arm, Shin pivoted off the bed and reached for a silk robe. Kanari rapidly did the same. Coarsely tying the robe in shape, Shin waited for Kanari to get ready before grabbing onto her palms. With one hand, Shin held onto his lover's hand. The other one gently pushed open the balcony's door, revealing a starless night.
The night was cold, as expected from Celestial Island at this time of year, but Shin didn't feel the chill. Kanari embraced the man by the waist, transferring her body heat to him, and vice-versa. Shin gazed up at the sky. Though there weren't any stars to speak off, the luminous moon that hung overhead made the night all the more picturesque. Was the moon something like this when Shin and Ariel first talked about chasing Yggdrasil? Shin couldn't remember. However, just thinking about that night put a broad smile on his face. Alas, that was the source of his confusion… His feelings towards Ariel.
"Kanari, I loved Ariel. I loved her more than anything else in my life..." Shin declared his affection to another woman who was not his future wife. The sides of Kanari's lips flinched a little, but she didn't interrupt Shin.
"My second goal… The drive to become powerful enough to chase Yggdrasil… It was all because I loved Ariel so much that I couldn't bear not seeing her ever again. In the past, each time I closed my eyes, I could see her tomboyish face filled with freckles and her gorgeous smile that just oozes with cheerfulness. I'd thought… My feelings from back then would never change. I'd thought… That once I reached the Immortal Realm, I could live happily ever after with Ariel and all those that passed on… However..."
Shin's gaze never left the moon. There was a tinge of sadness, anxiety and most importantly of all… turbulence.
"In recent days, those dreams haunt me less and less now. I now no longer remember Ariel's scent. I can see her face in my memory, but I can't remember if she had any moles or not. Before, whenever I closed my eyes, I could see Ariel's face as if she were standing right in front of me. Now, it's starting to get fuzzy." At this point, Shin tightened his grasp on Kanari's hands, turning over to the young woman. There was a slight murmur in his tone, as the man failed to keep a straight face. Confusion went left unchecked would lead to paranoia. And paranoia went left unchecked… would lead to primal fear.
"I love Ariel… But did I really love her enough if I can forget her?" Shin was afraid… He was afraid of his own feelings, about his own convictions. Shin had everything now. A beauty in his hands. A loving family in the form of the orphans and Lady Seph. Backing by one of the most powerful nations in the world. Eternal friendships with his closest allies. Shin had everything, and he was... happy.
"I've been living my life in the hopes of reviving Ariel, however long that takes. But as I grew older, I started to realize many things. When I reached the Immortal Realm and manage to revive Ariel… Wouldn't she be just fourteen? I'm now twenty-three, and god knows how long would I take to become a Spirit Immortal. Even if I'm fast and transcend my mortality forever in twenty, thirty years, I would still be a forty or fifty-year-old man. Would it be proper for me to love Ariel as I loved you now?" Shin recalled the fiery time he'd just had with Kanari. There was no way that he, as someone who was much more mature than a fourteen-year-old, would condone such an act with a revived Ariel.
"By the time we beat the Black Masks, by the time I become strong enough to rise above the firmament and transcend all mortals… Will my love for Ariel still be the same? Right now, my feelings have already started to erode, be it by time or by my association with you. When I have children, when I have a family, when I become older… Would my feelings still be the same? My second goal… Would I still want to achieve it?"
That was the source of Shin's confusion. He didn't know… He didn't know what he was fighting for anymore. Yes, he wanted to see Ariel right now, but as time continued to flow, Shin's resolve started to wane. The source of his relentless drive to improve had been shaken, and Shin couldn't be more confused.
There was no question that he still loved Ariel, but recently… Kanari had been slowly climbing through the ranks. In fact, it was to the point where Shin now loved Ariel and Kanari equally as much. One was his childhood love that Shin couldn't forget. The other was his wife-to-be, who had stuck with him through thick and thin. No… In a few decades, Shin was confident that his love for Kanari would deepen. Then… Would Shin still have the desire to chase Yggdrasil?
"Shin, you little fool..." Kanari wasn't put off by her man's inner turmoil, though. Instead, she looked at her man with exceedingly warm eyes. Shin was a genius, that was for certain. Alas, he wasn't particularly adept with his emotions. He was a man that wore his heart on his sleeve. If Shin were angry, he would scream. If he were sad, he would cry. If Shin were confused, he would willingly show his weakest state. All of these weren't negatives in Kanari's eyes though.
"Do you remember the promise you've made me?" Kanari declared, only to be met with an inquisitive look by her man.
"Which one?"
"You'll continue to seek Ariel, to reach the Immortal Realm. However, in the mortal realm, you'll never love another… other than me." Kanari reflected on the time she'd shedded the first barrier of mortality. Shin had came to her cave and gave her that oath, possibly to ease her mind for smooth progress into the higher realm. It was also the day where Shin officially became her boyfriend.
"In the beginning, I'd harboured a small amount of discontent… I've done so much for you, but yet, I was still your number two. However, because I could earn your heart, I'd thought that it was all worth it." Kanari continued. "But I soon got to thinking… Why was I willing to love you so much even though you were still chasing another? I thought about it long and hard… I could have gotten any man in the world, and their sole dedication would be solely on me… So why was I so willing to relegate myself to the number two spot? And I think I've recently got the answer..."
The ethereal beauty smiled: "It's because… I wanted your love. Shin, your dedication… Your blind faith to chase Yggdrasil, even though you don't know if it exists or not just to see Ariel once more… I wanted that desire all for myself."
"That..." Truth to be told, Shin felt bad for relegating Kanari to second place. However, Shin was a person who followed his heart. Back then, he simply loved Ariel too much. He loved her too much to even consider a second choice.
Kanari shook her head. "I'm not blaming you… I would have probably done the same. I can understand your predicament, and I know why you're confused, but Shin..."
The beauty let out an impish smile, one that was only trumped by their resident jester Elrin's. Leaning into Shin's ear, Kanari whispered: "Who said that you could only chase Yggdrasil for Ariel?"
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