At the same time, Leng Jin Yu returned into his house. He still didn't know how to approach the dragon king. Even his initial idea of asking Zhong Jing Yi for help didn't seem doable after he thought about it for a while. The youth was the reason why Longjun hated him so much. If he brought him into this, it would only make matters worse. No, he needed to find another approach.
He went to the study and sat down at the desk, habitually taking out a scroll of paper and grinding the ink. When he dipped the brush into it and wanted to start drawing he noticed that he didn't know what to paint though. It hadn't been long since he returned from the secret realm and a lot had happened so he probably shouldn't be surprised that he hadn't remembered anything.
His mind conjured up an image and Leng Jin Yu coughed. Alright. He shouldn't say he hadn't remembered anything. It was just … He peeked at the door but nobody could be seen. It would be strange if Jinde came by right this moment, wouldn't it? He had experienced something like that. He probably wanted to rest for a while and not see him. So … it shouldn't be a problem.
Leng Jin Yu coughed. "I've always painted what I remembered. I'm doing this just to sort my memories and see if I can call out some more. There's nothing more to it."
With another look to the door, Leng Jin Yu concentrated on the paper scroll and started to paint. The black lines soon combined to show the silhouette of a person or rather part of a person.
The longer Leng Jin Yu dwelt on what he had seen the clearer it seemed to get. It wasn't unlike with the courtyard so he could almost say with certainty that, yes, Jinde was the person from his past life. He hadn't just imagined something because he desired him. There really had been something like that. They had indeed spent that night together.
Leng Jin Yu put the brush aside when he had finished, picked up the painting and examined it. Mn, Jinde really was …
He grimaced when he noticed just where his thoughts had gone. This wasn't right! He was supposed to think about the memory, not relish in Jinde's appearance! Although it really was difficult. Jinde was a first-class beauty. Don't mention the mortal realm, even in the Nine Heavens he had never seen someone like him. And it wasn't just his outer appearance. The way he smiled and how his eyes twinkled as if trying to tell him of the thoughts going through his mind …
"Jin Yu?"
"Mn." Leng Jin Yu nodded. Yes, he would really give a lot to be the person on his mind. Being in this situation and hearing him whisper his name would certainly be very sweet.
"It turns out you're really talented with the brush."
Leng Jin Yu froze. Had he just … felt a person's breath on his cheek? He mechanically turned around and came face to face with Jinde. He hastily scrambled to put the painting away but in his frenzy, he actually dropped it.
Jinde managed to pick it up and admiringly held it up while taking a few steps away. Leng Jin Yu leaped to his feet and hurried after him.
"It's not what it looks like!"
Jinde turned his head to look at him, still a smile on his lips although Leng Jin Yu couldn't say for sure if it was condescending or teasing or maybe just innocent? It couldn't be that he hadn't recognized himself, could it? Well, there wasn't much to see of his face since he hadn't remembered that. In fact, his neck and chin were slightly blurred. As much as he had tried to clear his mind of any extraneous thoughts his memory just hadn't wanted to grace him with a clear view of this beautiful face.
Jinde held the painting a little further away. "It's not? But I thought it looked like a lovely painting."
"Lovely?" Leng Jin Yu wanted to reach over and take it from him but he was afraid that his actions would make even more obvious how uncomfortable he felt.
"Mn. It's painted with so much detail. Just look at the way the hair falls down the shoulders and curls where it is damp from the sweat as if this was something the painter had really seen. Or no, not just seen. He must have observed it. He must have lain next to him and studied him for a very, very long time and each detail must have been ingrained in his mind, maybe even into his soul. Isn't that something you would only do if you loved the other more than everything else? So, how isn't this a lovely painting?"
Leng Jin Yu watched Jinde's profile. Somehow, a frivolous painting of him seemed to have turned into a love confession. Somehow, the person in question had leaned on him and was now resting in his embrace. Leng Jin Yu blinked. Without conscious thought, he had even put an arm around his waist. Just what was happening here?
"Jin Yu …" Jinde pushed the painting over and Leng Jin Yu caught it reflexively. "I wanted to talk to you."
"Of course!" Leng Jin Yu made the painting float onto the table as carefully as he could. Now that Jinde had already seen it and didn't have any problem with it, he certainly wouldn't let it go to waste!
"It's about earlier. I had the feeling that … you blamed yourself very much because of what happened."
"I should."
"No …" Jinde slightly moved in his arms and lifted an arm, the back of his hand gently knocking his shoulder. "You shouldn't. Actually, I don't blame you at all so why should you blame yourself?"
"You're too kind." Leng Jin Yu reached up and held onto his hand. Jinde's fingers were slightly cold and he couldn't help but rub them.
As if on cue Jinde's cheeks reddened. "The truth is … the reason I wanted to be alone afterward wasn't because you hurt me. I was just … surprised and … maybe a little overwhelmed. You might not be able to understand this but …" He sighed. "I was afraid to tell you before but I felt very good in your arms and that made me question myself for a while."