Qiu Ling put Jing Yi down regretfully. But his mood lightened considerably when he thought of what would happen next. He gripped Jing Yi's hand and led him forward.
Jing Yi smiled. It seemed like Qiu Ling had already forgiven him. He was back to his old self.
Still, I should find a way to make it up to him. Even if he doesn't mind, all his effort was still wasted because of me. It's only right that I do something for him in return.
He looked up at Qiu Ling's smiling profile. He didn't have to think much to realize what Qiu Ling might appreciate. In his eyes, spending time together would probably be enough of a repayment. Jing Yi still felt like it wasn't enough but for now, he would do just that.
The place Qiu Ling had brought him to was the foot of a mountain. A lush forest grew all around and only a small path was left open.
Qiu Ling looked at Jing Yi expectantly.
"That … looks nice?"
"Mn! Come on!" Qiu Ling pulled him along.
The two of them passed the gate at the beginning of the mountain pass and then started to walk up. Jing Yi looked up at Qiu Ling questioningly. If the place they wanted to reach was on the top of the mountain, wouldn't it have been better to fly there directly? Why had Qiu Ling …
In the end, he smiled. He probably understood already. Qiu Ling wanted to spend time with him. Naturally, he would set him down here and then walk up with him. Wouldn't they take several times longer this way?
Mn, the idea was actually quite good. It wasn't sure yet if he would be able to cultivate at the place where Qiu Ling brought him. If he was still unable to do it, wouldn't this trip have been wasted? Thus, it was definitely better to find something they could do despite this. Like that they could still look back and say that this day had been successful.
"Qiu Ling."
"Mn? What is it, my love? Do you need something?"
Jing Yi shook his head. "No, I just thought that we'll probably be on the move for a while."
"That's right." Qiu Ling smiled brightly, proving that Jing Yi had guessed right. It really was intentional.
"Then … why don't we use this time to get to know each other a little better? We know next to nothing about each other, after all."
"Oh. Alright." Qiu Ling didn't know how to go about that, though. Back then he had sent his men to find out everything about Jing He they could and everything else … Uh, he probably shouldn't admit to it but he himself had done his fair share of spying on … ah, no, of observing his beloved, of course. There hadn't been much that had to be told directly.
"So … You've come to the Yun Zou Sect five years ago. What did you do before that?" Jing Yi didn't pick up on Qiu Ling's problems and just started to ask. He really wanted to know more about him.
"I …" Actually, I followed you around the whole time since your birth. That was the truth but he probably couldn't tell that to Jing Yi? "Mn, I was outside trying to help the people in need." It wasn't that far off. Hadn't he always tried to help Jing Yi and his parents?
Jing Yi's eyes gleamed and he gripped Qiu Ling's arm. "You must have done a lot of good deeds." This was exactly how he had always imagined the heroes from the stories. His opinion of Qiu Ling was instantly raised. This Senior Martial Brother of his might be a bit shameless now and then but he definitely knew right from wrong.
"Well, I tried."
Qiu Ling felt a bit uneasy about it, though. First of all, he had made problems for Jing He with everything he did. And secondly, he hadn't been able to save Mister Zhong. And that was solely because he was an idiot. Because of some small thing that had happened while his beloved couldn't remember a thing and was furthermore a child he had gotten so depressed that he actually fled back to the nine heavens and stayed there for a whole night. If he hadn't done that, if he had stayed in the human realm, then maybe the mortal father of his beloved could still be alive.
Qiu Ling suddenly stopped and pulled Jing Yi into his embrace. "I'm sorry."
"Why would you?" Jing Yi tried to look up at his face but Qiu Ling had lowered his head and his hair was blocking the view. Jing Yi didn't need to look, though. He understood even without that. There was such a desolate aura around him right now that one didn't need to be a cultivator to pick up on it.
Jing Yi reached up and silently rubbed Qiu Ling's back. "Whatever it is I'm sure it'll be alright."
Qiu Ling shook his head. "It won't. It will never be alright. It's all my fault." It seemed he really was destined to destroy whatever he held dearly.
Qiu Ling hugged his beloved even closer. No! No, he wouldn't stand for it. He could lose everything but not this person. Whatever happened he would keep him safe. That curse or whatever it wouldn't come true.
"Qiu Ling?" Jing Yi was close enough to feel Qiu Ling's quickening heartbeat and hear his ragged breath. He didn't understand what was going on but he could at least feel that something was wrong. Qiu Ling really seemed to be panicking right now.
Did I say something wrong? He thought back to what he said and then to Qiu Ling's answer. It seemed something had gone wrong sometime. And Qiu Ling probably felt guilty about it. Mn, this man was really such a good person. He cared deeply about others.
"Qiu Ling, it's alright. You can't save everyone. Whatever happened … it wasn't your fault. Sometimes, things are just fated to be."
Qiu Ling took a deep breath and tried to get his emotions under control again. He didn't want his beloved to see this side of him. He definitely didn't.
He raised his head and cupped Jing Yi's cheeks, gently rubbing his skin. "You don't understand. I really am sorry. Back then … if I had come to the capital a bit sooner, then … then your father might still be alive. You should fault me for that. But … I won't let anything like that ever happen again. I swear, I'll keep you safe. Nothing will happen to you. You're the most important person in my life." He didn't wait for an answer. He just bent down and kissed him again. It wasn't a sweet kiss like the one from before, though.
Jing Yi somehow felt like crying at that moment. Not because he was imagining that Qiu Ling was right and that his father might still be there if Qiu Ling had lent a hand back then. No, his heart was actually heavy because of Qiu Ling himself.
Someone you've seen five years ago for a short while and who you've spoken to for the first time just some days ago is your most important person? Qiu Ling, just what kind of life did you lead until now?
He didn't dare to ask but he noted the question down in his heart. There would certainly be a lot to speak about. For now, he just had to comfort him.
Jing Yi didn't need to think twice to figure out how to do that. He wrapped his arms around Qiu Ling's neck and kissed him back. And indeed, whatever had plagued Qiu Ling until now, he threw it out of his mind.
He forgave me. He actually forgave me! And in his head, he tried to imagine that his Jing He in the nine heavens would forgive him just the same should he ever find the courage to confess everything he had done in his life to him.