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I Didn't Even Want to Live, But God Forced Me to Reincarnate!

LynneSuzuran
7
chs / week
The average realized release rate over the past 30 days is 7 chs / week.
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Synopsis
A duke’s daughter wanted nothing in her life but the sweet nothingness of death, as she felt like her life served no purpose. Her wish was granted when she was killed in an unfortunate accident, yet in a sudden turn of events, she was forced to reincarnate. As fate has it, she was reborn in her original world, but not directly after her death. As she is living her new life, she tries to forget the pain of her old life. But, what exactly is behind her reincarnation? Will she be able to live her new life to the fullest? This is a slow-paced life journey of a reincarnated girl who's trying to find the meaning behind her past life and reincarnation. -------------------------------------------- ***Note*** : - This story isn't a premium novel here, but if you'd like to support me even further (and gain advanced chapter access + help increasing the novel's update rate), here is my Patreon page: https://www.patreon.com/ConvallariasLibrary Or if you prefer ko-fi (one time donation), here you go: https://ko-fi.com/A1864CG3 I'll be very thankful to you if you want to support this novel! ^^ - Chapter numbering or parting in Webnovel will be different than other platforms. - More info about what you can expect from this story (may give a vague spoiler) can be read in the review that I wrote. - If you're interested in joining my Discord server: https://discord.gg/qdF55vE Thanks for reading and for all who show your support (via comments, powerstones, etc)!
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Chapter 1 - Prologue

[ Cell Donor Consent Form]

Name : Reinst Carnatia Grabberton

Age : 13 years old

Cell(s) to be donated : (all checked).

"By this contract, I allow the use of my cells for those in need if anything were to happen to me."

I stare at the form I just filled. All perfect. Now, time to sign it for submission.

"Ara, such a young lady. Did you come here with your parents?"

I look up at the auntie talking to me: she wears a white coat, glasses and is holding a bunch of papers against her chest. Likely a staff from the Cell Donor Foundation.

"Yes. They are in the pharmacy over there."

"Really? But why would they let you fill the form by yourself then…?"

I look right at her, in the eyes.

"We've had a discussion. They told me that this is my decision, and that I had to be the one doing it all."

"Oh… Alright then."

She readjusts her glasses and returns to her occupation.

Hmm, in any case, it was a blatant lie~☆

Tee~hee~ ( ◞・౪・)

Not like she will know anyway. Plus, this is no big deal.

I just did what I could to hide the fact that I am weird.

Eh? What part of me is weird, you ask?

It can be really weird for someone as young as me, to decide on my own that I sign myself as a cell donor. Yep, it's not my parents' command. After all, what I told to the auntie before was a lie, you know?

Nobody my age would think about it-- since it's similar to thinking about death.

I would rather spout that lie rather than being suspected and labelled as weird. I'm tired of that kind of labelling.

" Wait a second."

"!!" Her voice stopped my movement.

No, please, no more trouble. I am already 13 years old, which means the country already acknowledges me as an adult, right?

Riviera country, my beloved..., nah, just kidding, I feel no love whatsoever towards the condition of my birth. But I feel lucky enough to be born in a country where adulthood is acknowledged as soon as 13 years. In the history books I read so far, it's said that the acknowledgement of an adult is given after one turns 18, 16, or even 21. It depends.

I turn around to look at the auntie. Got to be polite, right? Eye contact, eye contact~

"Yes, Auntie?"

"Do you have a minute?"

"Uhm... sure," I start to approach the kind-looking Auntie, reluctantly.

It better not be a problem...

"Auntie just wants to give the best of regards to you and your parents. My, what great parents, to have the heart to teach their children the importance of charity and donation. Even so, Auntie would like to pray that nothing befalls you and your kind family before the right time," blabbered Auntie with a cheerful face.

"Ee... thank you, Auntie!"

And with that, I dash off outside.

Okay, I hated the talk earlier. The talk built upon a lie.

What great parents? Truth be told, I would have preferred to be an orphan. Not like it will make any difference. Oh well, let's end another countdown to my death, shall we?

Haha, just kidding.

But seriously, I wonder, how long will I have to live this unsatisfying life?

Regardless of how unsatisfied I am with my own life, now that I signed the cell donation's form, I would like to believe that my existence would be of any use to people in this world.

Be it that I can finally live up to my mother's expectations (which is very hard... based on past experience) and obey every order given to me by my family, or perhaps my cells can save others. After all, I am quite "unique".

Cells donation.

In this world of magic, even illnesses that render cells dead is present. Besides managing your body function, cells also work as mana transmitter for magic. Which means, cells have their own affinity to magic. To cure those illnesses, cells transplants are needed. People without any affinity of magic will be able to accept the donor who have no affinity as well. No matter the age difference of the donor and receiver, the cells can be transplanted as long as they have the same magic affinity. Only some important cells can be transplanted, and once it succeeds, it can regenerates the other infected cells to be healthy.

Pretty efficient, eh?

Okay, getting back to my "uniqueness"... it is just that, my magic affinity—my attribute is rare.

But it is not something to be proud of. My magical capacities—my mana— is not that strong.

Besides that, my family comes from a knight's lineage. We are proud of our sword-wielding ability rather than magic—even though being good at magic is definitely a plus.

So, let's count!

Weak magic? Yes, I have it!

It's one point then.

What gender am I? A girl!!

My family values... boys over girls, as the title knight would be related to boys! (Why are boys stronger than girls? *sigh*)

That makes it two!! Two disappointment for myself, already.

So, my uniqueness is nothing to be proud of. Rather, the magic I am having an affinity with is seen as a sinister element of magic. People often discriminate and look down at me due to my attribute. And, that is the only magic I can use, too, due to my low mana...

Basically, I am a disappointment~ ★

If I were to rate my level of being disappointment, it would be... ★ ★ ★ ★ ☆

★ Being a girl in a family that values boys.

★ For having a bad luck in my attribute and mana capacity.

★ Not being attractive enough and for being so unloved by people around me.

★ Having a mind that only thinks of death.

☆ (white means not a disappointment!) Being born as a noble.

As of now, I am worth nothing. But I intend to at least worth something, before I die. And that is why I submitted that cell donor form.

I look up at the sky and notice at how it's still bright outside.

Since I went through a complicated process on getting the permission to wander off alone, let's not waste it!

Shall I take an aimless wander around the town until it gets dark?